tasting, touching, hearing, seeing

What happens on blog break

2012-02-01T12:40:00.003-05:00

...gets shared with the whole entire world when you come back from blog break.

Yes, I took a week or two to unplug from the blogosphere and just experience things. But I have not forgotten about my New Years' promise to document life! Here's what's been happening around my neck of the woods:

At work, I made a felt hamburger tree and got REALLY excited about it.

[source]
I ate tater tots for the first time since high school. I was wondering if they would stand the test of time and the sharpening of my palette, but let me tell you... tater tots are magical. I wish I had some right now.

I devoured some AMAZING British television: Sherlock and Spaced and Downton Abbey, oh my! Seriously, watch these shows. Then flail. Then e-mail me. We need to talk about how Benedict Cumberbatch sounds exactly like Alan Rickman, and how Tim just needs a hug, and how OMFG MARY MARY MARY.

I made this casserole -- it's like Hamburger Helper, but better because you use actual cheese instead of Mysterious Cheese Dust. It was perfect for a cold and windy Sunday night!

[source]
I finally saw Titan AE thanks to the magic of Netflix -- WHO has seen this movie? Can we talk about how it's basically Joss Whedon's animated test run of Firefly??

Matt and I picked out and ordered our wedding invitations from a local stationery shop! I'm so glad we ended up going to a local business instead of ordering online -- but more about that another time. Disclaimer: our invitations look nothing like these, though these are really cute. They're just an example of the kind of products that were in the shop. I'll show off our actual invites when I know they've all been sent out/received by our guests.

I had a pizza night with my best girls (minus one). I would highly, highly recommend making your own pizza rather than ordering out. Every time I do it I'm reminded how much cheaper, healthier, and yummier it is than chain pizza. If you want to take it to the next level, make your own pizza dough. I bought some pre-made from Wegmans because the idea of making dough from scratch makes me quiver with fear. But maybe one day. Maybe.

What have you all been tasting/touching/hearing/seeing lately?

You live, you learn

2012-01-20T19:48:00.001-05:00

The first lesson we learned in the new apartment:

Flowers need water AND sunlight to live.

Happy weekend, dear readers. Stay hydrated.

9 things I'm wishing for

2012-01-18T11:18:00.000-05:00

Why 9? ...Because that's how many things I thought of and I didn't feel like coming up with one more to make it an even 10. Honesty!

I'm pretty sensible when it comes to shoes -- it sort of comes with the territory when you work in a library -- but I have been ogling these pretties since they debuted on BHLDN's original line. They would be the perfect bridal shower shoes, you know, if they weren't 340 freaking dollars.

Seriously, Matt and I need one of these STAT. We've just been using the top rack of the dishwasher, which we promptly close, forgetting about the dishes inside forever.

Do I even need to explain why I need this thing? EVERY GIRL NEEDS THIS THING.

I'd love this on the side of our fridge. I'm particularly keen on that mustard one!

I'm a little bit obsessed with Parsons desks in funky colors right now, but I cannot understand WHY 5 planks of lacquered wood are so expensive. This is $350. $350!!!!!!!

I'm quivering with desire at the sight of these. OMG. I don't know what I would do with all 8 of them, but I WANT THEM.

This weekend I did a Back to the Future I and II marathon with Matt, my BFF Lindsay and her new boy -- blog moniker in the works -- and at some point I was like "I wonder if there's a flux capacitor that you can like, put IN your car." We laughed about it and moved on with our lives, but guess what guys? IT EXISTS!

I'm so flipping excited that Ree has come out with another cookbook. Her recipes are foolproof and I can tell you with utmost certainty that her Marlboro Man steak sandwich, mini orange muffins, and whiskey bread pudding are the reasons that Matt fell in love with me. Right, Matt?

I'm always looking for ways to bring color into our white box apartment since we can't paint, and ever since I found this rug on West Elm I've been pining over it. ::sigh:: Rug love.

In conclusion, this post has made me realize that I'm starting to develop scarily expensive tastes. Whats happening to me??

{sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9}

our apartment: a (super mega awesome) work in progress

2012-01-16T04:11:00.002-05:00

Welcome to my crib.

Technically, it's Matt's crib until I move in after the wedding this summer. But we've been doing quite a bit of nesting to get the place ready before then. There's still a lot more we want to do in terms of decorating and maximizing our storage, but here's where we've gotten so far.

Quite a transformation, if I do say so myself! The couch is a hand-me-down from my parents and the desk is from Matt's old bedroom -- oh, and that desk lamp is from my college years. The pendant lamp, curtains, and TV stand are all from Ikea. Can I *tell* you how happy I am to have a reason to buy things from Ikea now? If you love our end table as much as I do (that is, with the flames of a hundred fires), you might be interested to know that it came from Target, of all places!

The kitchen is teeny tiny, but it's fully loaded with updated appliances including A DISHWASHER ::triumphant fist pumping:: No hand-washing dishes for THIS domestic goddess, THANKS. Since Matt moved in we tried to soften the overwhelming whiteness of the kitchen with some of our tchotchkes -- but we have grand plans for this room, my friends. Grand plans indeed.

Not too big of a change here except the obvious addition of actual furniture. The dining set is another hand-me-down from my parents; in fact, this is the very table where I ate dinner as a child. My parents have seriously been amazing in the past few months -- they not only gave us a couch and a dining set, they bought a ridiculous amount of kitchen essentials off of our registry and just GAVE it to us, like "no biggie, just fully stocking your kitchen for you!" Oh, and Matt's parents bought us a TV and a Blu-Ray player for Christmas this year. Seriously, how do you even begin to say "thank you" for gestures like these? By giving them grandbabies, I guess. Eek.

Anyway, back to the room. We're planning on installing some vertical blinds that my dad has lying around (don't ask), and eventually I want to get some hanging plants to flank that big window. I'll keep you posted.

These two photos are from the kitchen. Every single thing pictured (except those awesome red gerbera daisies) is a gift from a friend. The Yoda lollipop and mug are from Matt's co-worker, the brain salt-and-pepper shakers are from our friend Dru, the bud vase is from Scotty and Jewel, and the R2D2 cross-stitch? A Christmas present from my BFF Lindsay. Proof that we have the best friends ever.

It's really the little things that make a place feel like home. Clockwise from top left:

a stack of beloved books, watched over by a mini librarian (Matt got me a "librarian action figure" for Christmas one year)
our brand new, dirt cheap entertainment stand from Ikea (ok, not "little" in size, but this thing makes us feel like Proper Adults and it cost us less than $100)
the Pac Man chair! Which is actually an old butterfly chair (I got it from Delia's back in junior high) that I threw a Pac Man Snuggie over. Look how happy Matt looks sitting in it!
the key rack that we installed right when you walk in. Jayne Cobb (from Firefly, in case you live a tragic life and do not know what/who that is) guards the door for us.

I planned to take pictures of the bathroom and bedroom too, but the daylight started fading and everything came out weirdly blue-tinted, like an episode of CSI. So you will just have to wait for part 2! I know you will be on the EDGE OF YOUR SEAT until then, readers.

Of course I'm omitting a lot of the less appealing qualities of the new place; for instance, how the outside stairwell always smells faintly of cigarettes and garbage, or how it's so small that when you pre-heat the oven to 400 degrees you're basically preheating THE APARTMENT to 400 degrees (not a problem in this sucky arctic NJ winter, but probably not gonna be awesome in August).... but overall? This is pretty freaking sweet, guys.

let's play a game!

2012-01-13T12:03:00.003-05:00

First of all, thanks to those of you who graced my return-to-blogging post with your super-nice comments! It makes me so happy to know that you are out there listening. And I certainly hope you meant that, because I need a bit of a favor from you, my dear readers.

Today we're going to play a game called You Decide What I Write About Next.

I've heard that interactivity is a Good Thing on blogs (am I breaking the blogging fourth wall here? OH GOD), plus I have a few ideas floating around in my head but I don't know what you, dear readers, would most like to hear about. Here are some of my ideas:

- an update post about wedding planning

- a tour of the awesome little apartment where Matt and I will be living after the wedding

- a post wherein I reveal and explain a very difficult decision I had to make in regards to grad school

- a review of some of the best books I read in 2011 and/or the stand-out books that I'm currently reading

- a tour of the library where I work, and my general take/feelings on the significance of libraries in the current climate

All of these posts will probably be written at some point, but my question to you all is: what should I write about next? Go ahead and leave your thoughts in the comments -- just imagine the Jeopardy theme song is playing while you write your answer... actually, I'll do you one better:

And I'll just sit here waiting for your comments, staring at my computer with lemur eyes, refreshing the browser window every 15 seconds. No biggie!

::taps the mic:: hello?

2012-01-11T12:40:00.001-05:00

According to my blogger account, there are theoretically 27 of you out there who are subscribed to these posts. I hope you're really out there, because guess what?

I'm alive!

Hooray?

(Just go with it...)

For those of you who are new to my blog, let me take a moment to re-introduce myself.

The subject in her natural state

Name: Melissa
Age: 24
Relationship status: Engaged to be married to one of the coolest and funniest people I know, my awesome partner-in-crime Matt
Place of residence: New Jersey, but not the New Jersey you're thinking of. I live in South Jersey, which is a state in and of itself. We're the reason NJ is called "the Garden State." OK, I live closer to Philly than to any farms, but drive 30 minutes south and you'll find yourself in Hammonton, the blueberry capital OF THE WORLD (and my fiance's hometown!)
Career: Librarian-in-training -- I staff the Youth Services desk at my local public library and I run the teen creative writing club AND our teen services blog.
Education: I have a fancy piece of paper that says I completed a Bachelor's degree in English. Woo! I'm also currently in graduate school for my Master's degree in Library and Information Science. FUN.
Favorite movies: I love movies so much; it's hard to pick. But LOTR: The Two Towers tops the list, along with Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Memento, and Carrie. You could say I have eclectic tastes.
Favorite books: See above. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass is a lifetime favorite; Paper Towns by John Green changed me; Transformations by Anne Sexton inspires me; and Coraline by Neil Gaiman terrifies and delights me.
Favorite food: All. My motto is EAT ALL THE FOOD. So, not the healthiest of mottos, but I think honesty is important in a blog.
Favorite cocktail: Malibu bay breeze (the girliest drink ever, I know, but hey -- life's too short to be self-conscious about beverage preferences!)
How long have I been blogging? Too long. Ten years now. I started up my "online journal" at Diaryland when I was fourteen and I've been blogging in some capacity, on and off, since then. Recently I've been "off." But one of my New Year's resolutions was to document life, so here I am.
What's up with the blog title? It's from this poem I love. But maybe one day I will change the name of this thing -- who knows?

To my old readers: I'm excited to be back. I appreciate all of you who have read in the past and hope you'll follow along this time around, too.

To any newbies stopping by: Welcome to my humble speck of the internet! Have a seat and enjoy the show :D

i've got something to tell you

2011-06-06T14:34:00.000-04:00

I've been a bad blogger. I'm hoping there are still some of you out there reading, because I've been following along with your lives even if I haven't been commenting. As for me... my life exploded with activity after I finished classes, what with the cruise and my family trip to Myrtle Beach and summer classes starting up and ... well... there was this one thing...

It happened just about three weeks ago, on Wednesday, May 18th. A little bit of backstory: Matt and I booked a seven-night cruise to the Bahamas a couple of months ago. One of the ports of call? Port Canaveral. An hour away from Port Canaveral? Disney World, aka my favorite place in the world. I was reluctant to commit to a day trip at first, but Matt insisted we go to Magic Kingdom just for the day. And there's no way I'm saying "no" if someone says, "do you want to go to Disney?"

I had suspicions, but no real evidence, that Matt was planning to propose. I was, I'd say, about 90% sure. And that's a dangerous place to be. What if he hadn't proposed? I would have been incredibly confused -- and devastated, for sure.

When we got to the park, Matt said he had to go to the bathroom, and I took the bait. I knew something was up because he knew exactly where the bathrooms were despite the fact that he hadn't been to Disney World since he was 13. I went to the bathroom too, taking my time, assuming that he was probably taking care of some logistics -- moving the ring from his backpack to his pocket, taking it out of the box, maybe. I came out to discover that Matt had disappeared. This is hadn't expected. I waited for about a minute and a half, and then my phone started ringing. This was it.

"Hey, I found Mickey! And I found someone to take our picture with him! Walk towards the flagpole and make a left, I'm right here!"
"Matt, there are literally hundreds of people all around me right now. I can't find you."

"Just do it!"

And then he hung up on me. I was really nervous now. My heart was pounding, my pulse whooshing in my ears. I scanned the crowds, caught his eye, waved.

Before I even had time to think, he was down on one knee, presenting me with this sparkly little disco ball set in platinum, and a park photographer was snapping pictures, and people all around us were clapping and saying "congratulations!" And at some point, I started bawling. Just all-out bawling, like a child.

Eventually I managed to gurgle out, "OF COURSE," and the crowd prompted us to hug, kiss, and put the ring on my finger.

Later on, after I called my parents and my sister and my best friends, I got the whole story out of Matt. After I'd entered the bathroom, he sprinted out into Main Street, USA and started searching for someone to be his accomplice. He chose well -- the two older women who he begged to help him turned out to be park workers in plain clothes! They hooked him up with a park photographer and grabbed his camera, too. By the time I got out of the bathroom, they'd set up an ambush.

May 18th, 2011 was probably the best day of my life. I was in Disney World, I was in the middle of an amazing cruise to the Bahamas, I had just come out of a tough semester of grad school with a 3.8 GPA, and I was engaged to my funny, generous, smart, and kind boyfriend. Though I guess he's my fiance now. WEIRD.

I wish I could bottle up that day and keep it on a shelf, and take a shot of it when I'm feeling low, in the future. For now, I'm trying to keep the feeling going for as long as I can.

I got it from my mama

2011-05-08T23:16:00.004-04:00

My lilliputian stature (She's 4'10'' and I'm 4'11'' -- so all you 5'3''-ers who think you're short can just stop right now).

My laugh.

My temper.

My dry skin issues.

My tendency to raise my voice to its ultimate decibel level when I'm [drunk] in a big group of people.

My flair for the dramatic.

My devotion to my friends.

My appreciation for footwear.

My compulsion to go straight for the sales rack in any store.

All my best qualities, all my worst qualities, and everything in between.

**

Happy Mother's Day to my mama and yours!

on strange obsessions and the best friends who fuel them

2011-05-07T08:20:00.005-04:00

Last night, at 10:53 PM, I submitted my final assignment for the spring 2011 semester.

I'M DONE!!!

I've never been so relieved to be finished with a semester of school in my life. This finals week was pure agony, right up until the last second -- and I really mean the last second. The biggest thing that motivated me to get through it was the fact that I am going to New York City today with my very best friend Lindsay, to see a Broadway show and roam Times Square and be unabashedly touristy (one of my favorite things to do in the whole world)!

We're seeing Wonderland, a modern-day musical adaptation of Alice In Wonderland set in New York City. I'm not sure if those who read this blog know that Alice in Wonderland is basically my favorite things of all time. Before I was a Joss Whedon geek or a Star Wars geek or a LOTR geek, I was an Alice geek. First of all, I take the book way, way too seriously and consider it my own personal property (so much that I'm hostile towards almost everyone who says they also "love" the book). I have been collecting Alice-y things since I was 13 (especially White Rabbit stuff, Red Queen stuff, anything with the original Tenniel illustrations, and reinterpreted illustrations). I read The Annotated Alice at least once a year. I make it a point to try and write a paper on Alice every semester. And I've seen almost every single adaptation of Alice on the big screen, small screen, and now, the stage.

I'm super lucky to have a best friend who feeds my strange obsession, so much as to gift me with the opportunity to see the only version of Alice that has existed on Broadway to my knowledge. And she'll be here in about 10 minutes, so I'd better get my act together.

I wouldn't want to be late. For a very important date.*

Hee hee!

*From the song "I'm Late" sung by the White Rabbit in the 1951 Disney adaptation. The White Rabbit never says this in Carroll's book. He does, however, say, "Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be too late!" which does not rhyme.**

**I told you I was an Alice geek. It's insufferable, I know.

breaking my silence with -- what else? -- a list

2011-04-19T13:40:00.007-04:00

First off, I'd like to apologize for my unannounced absence. I've spent the last two months alternating my time between freaking out about school, freaking out about work, and freaking out about when Matt might propose (SQUEE WAITING IS SO HARD). I've been slowly accumulating levels of stress/anxiety only previously seen in certain Cathy comic strips.

But the next two weeks are going to be hellish beyond imagining. Those of you who have endured/are currently enduring higher level education can understand the panic and terror that comes along with the last couple weeks of a semester. Finals, term projects, research papers, presentations... after I graduated with my BA I swore that I was done with this world, but this semester I am eating my words. I have SO MUCH to get done before I am home free, and so little time to do it.

To get myself through this, I've been compiling a list of everything I get to do once this is all over. Behold,

THE THINGS I SHALL DO WHEN I AM FINALLY DONE WITH THE SEMESTER

1) I will get a haircut. My hair is a shaggy horror right now. I need a good two or three inches off the ends, and I want to get my awkwardly-growing-out bangs cut into some sideswept bangs for the summer. Cause I'm not going to try to maintain blunt bangs in NJ humidity. I'm just not.

2) I will play The Sims 3 for as long as I damn well please. 24, maybe 48 hours at a time-- who cares? I WILL HAVE NO RESPONSIBILITIES BITCHES.

3) I will allow myself to obsess over every pre-planning detail of my upcoming cruise with Matt. I LOVE getting ready for trips. I find it almost as fun as actually going on the trip, because I am a big weirdo. But as of right now I'm trying my absolute hardest to not fixate on the cruise when I have so many other things to take care of. But as soon as May 6th rolls around... we're talking itineraries, packing list spreadsheets, new bathing suits and dresses, potentially even new luggage. Okay, I need to stop talking about this because I'm starting to get a little too excited about it. Whew.

4) I will hang out with my friends every day that it is possible for us to hang out. Enough said, I think.

5) I will blog every day. I'm serious. Every day between May 6th (the day the semester ends) and May 15 (the day Matt and I leave for our cruise), I solemnly swear that I will post daily. I have a lot to make up for :)

So there you have it. Right now I'm just a busy girl with dreams of being not-so-busy. I hope I'll be able to check in again before finals hell is over -- my birthday (which is also my blog's first anniversary) is in less than a week, so I'll try to post then. I'll see you on the other side!

Hi, it's me.

2011-03-23T23:22:00.002-04:00

Three weeks in Blog Land is like a lifetime. Do you know what kinds of Things can happen in three weeks? Big Things. New Job Things. Tiger Blood Things. Tsunami Things. Supermoon Things.

It feels like the world's gone all tilty and fisheye since my last post. Suddenly everyone is worshipping Charlie Sheen and there's been a horrible natural disaster and a song like this has gone so viral that I've willingly watched it at least ten times to date.

And also I've been thinking more and more about

gulp

writing a book.

It all started when I re-discovered some of my old writing from college. Most of it made me cringe, but I happened upon this super-short story I wrote back in sophomore year, and... I don't know. This crazy thing happened where I was able to read the piece outside of myself, see the potential in it. Hm. There's an actual voice here, I thought. There's a story in here somewhere, too. Hm.

Something was ignited in me that day. Something that I've been trying to shake as I've been struggling to balance work and school and the rest of my life over the past few weeks. Because I can't want this right now. I have another dream, another life goal that's even more important to me and almost in reach: becoming a librarian. I should be focusing on finishing school, developing professionally, and finding a job. But I'm sitting here right now, consumed by the notion of writing a YA novel.

For the first time in several months, I'm really, really confused. Am I just looking for a distraction from school, which sucks (sometimes)? Is this the final phase of my quarter-life crisis? Or is it just residual effects from the Supermoon?

I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS.

how i learned to stop worrying and love the oscars

2011-02-28T12:42:00.007-05:00

So a couple of weeks ago, I decided to throw an Oscars costume party. I made the Facebook event and promptly never thought about it again. Until Sunday morning, when I realized I AM HAVING A PARTY IN 7 HOURS AND I HAVEN'T DONE SHIT. So here's what my Sunday was like. I:

1) played the piano at an 11:30 AM Catholic mass that ran late.
2) went to AMC movie theater to buy two $10 gift cards (these were prizes.. more on that later)
3) went to the supermarket to buy $25 worth of snacks plus popcorn and movie candy (for prizes).
4) went to PetSmart to buy food and bedding for Huxley the hedgie.
5) waited in the car listening to Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson while Matt went into the liquor store to buy beer.
6) cleaned Huxley's whole cage (which was really overdue for a cleaning, so it took FOREVER).
7) haphazardly wrapped up the prizes
8) de-cluttered, dusted, slightly re-arranged, and vacuumed the family room (OK fine, Matt vacuumed while I took a shower).
9) had a crisis when the super cute Oscar ballots I was going to use turned out to be printed in the faintest of gray inks (WTF were they thinking?) and so I had to use a less cute (but highly readable) ballot from Moviefone.com.
10) scrambled to put together my costume at 6:00, which ended up being comprised completely of garments that were either too small or too big for me.
11) ordered the pizza at 6:30, only to find that Matt had called the wrong restaurant branch (the right one is 4 minutes from my house, the wrong one is ...50 minutes away) and so the pizza didn't actually show up until like 7:30.
12) started to get really nervous that the party would bomb and we would all be sitting in awkward silence and my friends would pelt me with M&Ms at me at the end for wasting their time

But that didn't happen, fortunately. The point of this complain-fest is that all of that stress was negated by pretty great night. The ballots provided us (or at least me) with more of a reason to be invested in the winners, and we talked about movies almost the whole time, which is one of my favorite things to do. I'm so grateful to have friends who are willing to debate the distinction between sound editing and sound mixing.

Oh, shut up and just show us the costumes, you are saying. Happy to oblige, my friends. Happy to oblige.

Matt as R.P. McMurphy from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (Best Picture Winner 1975). Or MAYBE as Joe Pesci in Home Alone. The jury's still out on that.

Me, looking FLY as Frodo from LOTR: Return of the King (Best Picture 2003). Do you see THE PRECIOUS? That's my sister's earring.

Linds as Maria von Trapp from The Sound of Music (Best Picture 1965). She also brought crisp apple strudel, a brown paper package tied up with string, and some fake edelweiss-looking flowers. Unsurprisingly, she won the prize for best costume. (Do you read her blog? You should probably be reading her blog.)

Hey! It's Cait of Finding My Balance as one of the six merry murderesses from Chicago (Best Picture 2002). She also pwned all the rest of us in the Oscar ballot with 14 CORRECT PREDICTIONS. What the how does that even.

Cait's boyfriend E as Sargeant Sean Dignam from The Departed (Best Picture 2006). A very merry Sgt Dignam, if I may say!

Scotty as William Wallace from Braveheart (Best Picture 1995). This party MAY have been an elaborate set-up designed to get him to wear his kilt again. Kilts are awesome.

Jewel as Arwen from LOTR: Return of the King. Her costume is so rad. She has the Evenstar (which you can kind of see here) and a cool hooded cloak (which she took off for this picture) and everything.

Mara as Maggie Fitzgerald from Million Dollar Baby (Best Picture 2004). I have a few pictures of her pretending to punch things but I didn't think she'd appreciate me posting them for all of the Internetz to see.

And finally, my friends Katie and Kevin came dressed in all green in a satisfyingly meta if somewhat literal interpretation of How Green Was My Valley (Best Picture 1941). Unfortunately I don't have blog-worthy picture of them :(

So the moral of the story is: parties are a lot of work, but you should still have them because they're almost always worth it. Especially if you get to see your friends dressed up in funny outfits.

fridays are for filling blanks in

2011-02-25T16:39:00.000-05:00

(I am seriously loving the chevron in this graphic, not to mention how well it matches my blog design 0_0)

1. I am currently obsessed with engagement rings. It's sick. I stalk the diamond stock at Blue Nile at least twice a day, and I've built my own ring more times than I care to mention. At the library where I work, I literally STARE at female patrons' engagement rings trying to see what they look like. I realize how creepy this is but I can't stop. I JUST WANT A DIAMOND RING IT'S A LIFELONG DREAM!

2. Today I am impatient because Matt is waiting to hear back about a job offer (it's down to him and one other person AHH) and I know that as soon as he finds out, he'll call me. So instead of doing work or getting dressed I have just been sitting and staring at my phone, WILLING it to ring.

3. The age I am is 23 (24 in 2 months) and the age I feel is directly related to who I'm with and what I'm doing. When I'm with my younger sister and we're carsinging Taylor Swift songs, I feel about 15. When I'm at work answering reference questions and ordering around the teen volunteers, I feel much older than I am. When I'm with my friends and we're talking about our lives I feel like I'm exactly as old as I should be. But as soon as I hear about some distant friend getting engaged, I get anxious about moving forward to the Next Level.

4. My favorite place is Disney World. Yes. You read that correctly. I've been to Disney five times and I'm going again with Matt this May, when our cruise stops in Port Canaveral, FL. It's gonna be awesome because he hasn't been since he was like, 11, and the only thing better than going back to Disney is going back to Disney with a n00b.

5. Something I have been procrastinating on is um, everything? Grad school work, getting my eyebrows done, getting my ends/bangs trimmed, depositing my paycheck, writing an encounter for the Serenity RPG I'm running, putting together my costume for my Oscars watch party. I really am an expert procrastinator.

6. The last thing I purchased must've not been very exciting, because I can't even remember. OH. Yes I do. It was my mom's birthday present. Her birthday's on Tuesday!

7. The thing I love most about my home is that I get to live here for free. That's not to say that I don't love many other things about my home (my family is here, my doggie is here, it's 10 minutes away from my workplace, it's situated in between Philly and NYC, etc.), but the thing I love MOST about my home is definitely that I do not pay bills.

Wanna play? Pay Lauren a visit and link up.

a quick note about ZOMBIES (and charity)

2011-02-24T11:08:00.001-05:00

A few of you mentioned that you were interested in reading Zombicorns, esteemed YA author John Green's NaNoWriMo project. I just wanted to let you know that you can actually read it for free by downloading it from EffYeahNerdfighters.

However, the book was originally only available for download with a donation of $25 to the Harry Potter Alliance, which is this amazing charity that "fights the Dark Arts in the real world" by teaming up with non-profits that promote human rights and literacy. I care deeply about both of those two things, so I encourage you to donate if you can. But in either case, you still get the book :)

what i'd rather be doing besides schoolwork

2011-02-21T17:44:00.002-05:00

learning how to make jewelry

watching Futurama

reading Anna and the French Kiss or John Green's zombie novella

baking brownies in a muffin tin (BRUFFINS)

browsing/choosing shore excursions for the cruise that Matt and I are taking in May

playing with Huxley the hedgehog

taking Pilates classes (or maybe yoga!)

playing The Sims 3

daydreaming about having a literary-themed wedding

DIY-ing details for my Oscars Watch Party on Sunday

(sorry, IRL friends... my party isn't going to be as cute as Twig and Thistle's)

ANYTHING!

Alas, I am floating in a sea in post-graduate assignments. And I must tend to them. Sad face.

Indulge me: what would you rather be doing right now?

ecky-ecky-ptang-zoo-boing-zow-ZING!

2011-02-18T13:18:00.000-05:00

The following exchange occurred on Gchat yesterday:

Matt: friendly's is open until 11
me: :-\
i can't control myself around a friendly's
i'm all like OM NOM MINI MOZZO STICKS
OM NOM NOM WAFFLE FRIES
Matt: well
let me be in control then
single scoop
one topping
me: D:
me: NOT THE ONE SCOOP
NO
NUUUUUUUUU
Matt: no no, you're doing it improperly
it's NIIII
me: ... nu?
Matt: ni
me: ... nu?
Matt: no no no
its ni
ni ni ni
me: ni!
NI!
NI!
NI! NI!
Matt: excuse me!
are you saying "ni" to that woman?
me: NI!
Matt: oh what dark times are these
me: LOL

Can I just say how lucky I am to be with someone with whom I can quote entire scenes from Monty Python and the Holy Grail? If you'd told 17-year-old me that this would be my future, I probably would have laughed in your face (and then gone and watched some toons on Homestar Runner. I wasn't a very cool 17-year-old).

P.S. My IRL best friend, Linds, just resurrected her old blog -- you should all go check her out and leave her some welcome-back love. AND Matt started one too (but his computer died recently so he hasn't posted much.) Still, go check him out as well.

rapid-fire meme completion!

2011-02-17T01:14:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling pretty productive tonight, so I decided to bang out two memes that the wickedly awesome Angie tagged me in. To start: A Penmanship ~~Quiz~~ Survey. Gah. I have terrible handwriting and this felt a lot like a second-grade handwriting test. I think knowing that this was going on the blog made me self-conscious, which translated into me adding all these weird underlines for emphasis. Blerg.

But! I did use a fun green pen, so you get to enjoy that. Anyway, here are the rules:

Answer the following questions using regular old pen (or other writing implement) and paper:
1. What's your name/your Blogger name?
2. What's your blog's name/URL?
3. Write "the quick fox jumps over the lazy dog" [I may have taken creative liberties with this one]
4. Favorite quote?
5. Your favorite song?
6. Your favorite band/singers?
7. Anything else you want to say?
8. Tag 3-5 other people

Here's how it went for me:

Bahhh I hate my handwriting!

PART THE SECOND

I got an award!

The Honest Scrap award! Angie says getting this award means that you don't hold back and you tell the truth, which may or may not mean that you guys think I'm oversharing and need to stop the TMI. That's entirely possible. Regardless, I get to share 10 absolutely honest things about myself now!

1) When I daydream about my future kids, I hope for girls. This is more than likely because girl names are SO MUCH MORE FUN to pick out than boy names.

2) I have tried on three separate occasions to learn how to knit, and it's never gone well. I tried to crochet a couple times, too, and I sort of learned, but all I can do is make rows and rows of double stitches. Not very impressive.

3) I'm not really a picky eater, but there are few relatively innocuous foods that I just don't understand: capers, pickled ginger (the pink stuff you get with sushi), and olives.

4) I have an unhealthy addiction to overpriced beauty products. (Philosophy, I AM LOOKING AT YOU.)

5) If I could eat macaroni and cheese for the rest of my life and never gain weight, I would already be eating it right now. At 12:46 AM.

6) Even though I haven't written creatively since college, I still hold onto the hope that I'll be a famous author one day. It was my dream growing up! Some things are hard to let go of.

7) Once I left a bag of strawberries in my work tote for over a week and then it exploded rotted berry pulp all over my library books.

8) By "once," maybe I mean "last week." Err.

9) I am a closet fan of Nicki Minaj. Wow, did I really just admit to that in a public forum?

10) What do you think I should do about the library books? I should probably offer to replace them, right? I mean, I hate when people just leave their damaged books in the book drop and run. Own up to your sins!

OK, clearly I'm getting tired. I should wrap this up. Instead of tagging people, I though I'd just link to some of my favorite bloggers that embody the spirit of "Honest Scrap":

Smile Big and Pretty

Jas is trying to break into SHOW BUSINESS and she shares every sordid detail of her rise to the top-ish area.

So Lovely

Heather's old blog has been reborn into this cozy den of self-affirmation and self-actualization. Reading her blog reminds me that you should be your own biggest supporter.

All & Sundry

To fully understand me as a blogger, you MUST READ this blog. I discovered Linda back when I was a pimple-faced thirteen year old who had just started up an "online journal" on Diaryland, the now-essentially-defunct hosting platform. She's hilarious, an amazing writer, and a pretty cool mom to boot.

my life in labels: librarian training

2011-02-11T17:28:00.001-05:00

I know I have 3 memes/awards to work on, but I feel compelled to write an actual post about my life before I tackle all of that. So.

MY LIFE. It can be roughly broken up into four categories:

LIBRARIAN TRAINING
REDUCING MY MASS
ROLLIN' WITH THE HOMIES
MUSHY KISSING STUFF

Sometimes there are more, of course, depending on the seasons. And of course the categories bleed into one another -- life can't be neatly compartmentalized, I don't really have that mindset -- but those are truly my four biggest priorities at the moment. So, do you want to know what's happening? Of course you do, otherwise you wouldn't still be reading. Now, this is a lot, so we'll start with the first category:

LIBRARIAN TRAINING.

For those of you who are new: I want to be a librarian for children and teens. I'm literally obsessed with it -- I have never been this determined to reach a goal in my life. So I'm in graduate school for my Master's in Library and Information Science, and I've been working as a Youth Services Assistant in my local library for the past year and a half. This week though, I had kind of a huge breakthrough that I really want to share with you guys.

This year, I'm running the library's teen creative writing club. We got snowed out of our first two meetings of the year, and though I acted frustrated when I had to cancel, I have to say I was profoundly relieved. Both times I was insanely nervous -- not looking forward to it at all. Part of it was that I felt kind of unprepared and clueless (I'd run teen programs before, but never on my own!), but on a whole different level, all of these latent bad memories from my disastrous student teaching experience in college were rising to the surface. Remember how you choked? this insidious version of myself was whispering to me in my head. They must have thought you were such a joke. Maybe you just don't give off the right vibe for teens. The worrying grew louder and louder for two weeks.... up until yesterday.

Yesterday there was no snow. I couldn't hide anymore. I came to work knowing that we would be meeting no matter what, so I had better get comfy with the idea. And so my nerves sort of dissipated, or translated into nervous energy. The whole afternoon I couldn't stop neurotically looking over my agenda feeling unsatisfied with what I'd decided on. I changed my mind on my icebreaker activity about 4 times, changed the warm-up, frantically photocopied passages from books and organized all of the materials into neat little piles, to be distributed to each teen.

Before I knew it, 6:00 had rolled around and I was standing in the craft room, making small talk with Sarah, the first person to show up.

It's funny how most of the time, it's the anticipation that shuts you down. It's like a roller coaster -- that slow, creaky, uphill climb is when you panic, when you shout "I WANT TO GO BACK," when you seriously begin to doubt your judgment. But then you're rushing towards the ground and the wind is in your hair, and you don't stop to think "I WANT TO GO BACK" -- you're in it, baby!

For me, those two weeks were the uphill climb in a roller coaster car. I doubted myself and I told myself it wasn't too late to quit. But as soon as we sat down to begin the meeting, all of my nerves turned into pure adrenaline -- the good kind of adrenaline that allows you to think on your feet and say all the right things.

(By the way, that adrenaline rush never happened to me when I was student teaching. Once we started my nerves would just get worse and worse and wouldn't relent until the class period was over.)

It didn't go off without a hitch; the icebreaker took up almost the entire hour and we barely got to the writing warm-up and prompt. But the teens were engaged, laughing, enjoying themselves. They had come to something I had put together and they were enjoying themselves.

I didn't realize until I was was cleaning up that I hadn't stopped smiling since the meeting began. I stopped and tried to digest what had just happened. I planned, organized, and ran my own library program for teens. I got paid to hang out and talk about Lord of the Rings with a bunch of interesting young people.

And I was going to get to do it again in two weeks.

Best of all, I knew with utmost certainty that this is where I want my life to go. That I'd finally translated my interests into a viable career option -- second time's the charm, I guess.

So, now I'm sure. I just have to get the qualifications, even if it kills me in the process. But grad school -- that is another post entirely.

to start: a survey

2011-02-02T01:39:00.000-05:00

Let's get things started the right way.

It's meme time, bitches.

I saw this survey on Angie's blog and found the questions quite thought-provoking -- I will tag one or two people at the end, but feel free to steal it and post it if you want.

And now. A Random Survey of Randomness.

1. If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or as members of your family?
I have two pets. There's our family dog, Hickory:

He's such a sweet pup! OK, he's not really a pup (he's 11 years old) but he still acts like he's one. Hickory is definitely like a member of our family -- he eats meals with us, sleeps upstairs with us, gets birthday presents, sits for our annual family Christmas portrait. The only thing we do without Hickory is vacation, but we leave him at home and have one of our friends come play with him and feed him every day, so it's kind of like a vacation for him too, let's be honest.

Aaaand there's my hedgehog, Huxley, aka Mr. Hux-a-lux/Cliff Huxtable/Super Hux:

If Oscar the Grouch and Eeyore the Donkey had a prickly love child, it'd be Huxley. He keeps to himself and seems generally distrustful of people, even those who are nice to him and feed him worms!

2. If you could see one of your dreams come true, which would it be?
Lately my pipe dreams revolve around winning millions in the lottery, dropping out of grad school and just working part-time at the library while pursuing my other interests on the side. But uhhh, I'm pretty sure my chances are something like 1 in 80,000,000. So I think I will stick with my current plan.

3. What is the one thing that you hate the most?
I really, really hate two things: bugs, and poop. But it's no big deal. I make it through life all right. But you should just know that if you're going to try to show me the ladybug you caught, I will shriek and run away. Likewise, if you're going to make a poop joke, just know that I won't laugh and might punch you instead.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Oops... I kind of already answered this question in #2 without realizing it. But I can definitely think of more: I'd pay off Matt's student loans; I'd pay my parents' mortgage; I'd pay my sister's college tuition and set aside $100,000 for the college tuitions of my two future kids; I'd inject tons of money into local libraries; I'd buy an electric car; I'd donate to charities; I'd hire an investor so I could make more money; I'd go to New Zealand and Morocco and Ireland and Japan. I could go on...but I'll spare you :P

5. What helps to pull you out of a bad mood?
I'm a very socially oriented person and I usually need to talk myself out of my bad mood with somebody else. Otherwise, I try to take a nap and just sleep it off.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
I don't think you can really say that one is more "blessed" than the other. I think that, when it comes to falling in love, you need both parties to be fully present for the magic to happen. If you love someone but they don't reciprocate, it can make you spiral into despair, envy, or rage. If you're not as into someone as they're into you, it can weigh you down with guilt or cause you to be careless with the person's feelings. Either way, no one's as happy as they could be. /lecture

7. What is your bedtime routine?
You know, Stephany just wrote a post about making an effort to improve her nighttime routine, and it inspired me to re-evaluate my bedtime habits, too. I don't really have a good solid "routine" -- I just head upstairs when I get tired, then read until I can't hold the book up anymore, then pass out until the morning. I'm hoping to make a change to a more structured, regular routine. But that's another post.

8. If you are currently in a relationship, how did you meet your partner?
Matt and I met at an IHOP. Well, technically, we met when we both took a class called "Early Modern Europe," but it was our professor's split decision to take our class to IHOP right before midterms that brought me and Matt face-to-face for the first time. We ended up sitting across from each other, and then we bonded over Homestar Runner in-jokes, and then he offered to buy me pancakes -- who can resist a Strong Bad-quoting, pancake-buying history nerd? Not me. Anyway we're coming up on four years now and we still love pancakes.

We're awkward and we don't care who knows.

9. If you could watch a creative person in the act of the creative process, who would it be?
I love movie-making, so I'd love to shadow a director -- specifically, Joss Whedon. Although I'm sure I'd only hinder his creative process because I'd just be jumping up and down and fangirl-screaming the whole time.

10. What kinds of books do you read?
I spent my whole college career reading Dead White Males and post-modernist poetry, so I have a real appreciation for literature (pronounced "LIT TRA CHA," naturally) but truth be told, the books I enjoy reading the most are comics/graphic novels, Young Adult fiction, dystopian fiction, and memoirs.

12. What’s your biggest fear?
I'll openly admit that I fear death more than anything, and I especially fear losing the people I love through unexpected and sudden circumstances.

13. Would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to visit outer space?
Well, it depends. I love space and I'm waiting not-so-patiently for affordable intergalactic tourism to become a reality. I would gladly train for years and eat only the most healthful foods until the end of time if it earned me a spot on a luxury space cruise liner. But if we're talking, say, a one-shot orbit around the Earth in a cramped space shuttle, no way. I love Kit Kats too much.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?
Initially I had a problem with this question because I thought it was suggesting that being unmarried or poor is inherently bad, whereas being married or rich is inherently good -- neither statement is really true. But I gave it some thought, and realized that this question (I think) is designed to reveal something about your personal idea of happiness. I think I'd be pretty happy if Matt and I got married, and I'd also be pretty happy if someone suddenly handed me a check for 5 million dollars. I think I could get by without the 5 million, though, as long as I knew I had Matt, my best friends, and my family.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Put my glasses on! I can't see anything without them.

16. If you could change one thing about your spouse/partner what would it be?
I'd rid him of his phobia of having his fingernails touched, clipped, or otherwise messed with. It's a lot more annoying than you'd think!

17. If you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?
I think I've answered this question in a previous meme -- I like my name well enough, but I'd be willing to change it to Keiko. Full disclosure: a classmate in high school used to call me that because I slightly resemble Keiko Agena, the actress who played Lane on Gilmore Girls.

18. Can you forgive and forget, no matter how horrible the offense is?
No. Well, yes, I often forgive people, it's an important part of being a friend. But it's the "no matter how horrible" part that gets me. I have my limits. There are some pretty horrible things out there -- betrayal, deception, sabotage -- and if one of my friends somehow morphed into the kind of person who was capable of doing any of that, I'd drop him or her like a stick of dynamite. Is that crazy of me?

19. If you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?

[photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/pioneerwoman/497215724/]

I hope that this challenge takes place in an imaginary world where I wouldn't get scurvy if I ate the same thing for six months. Well, anyway. This is a no-brainer. I pick the Pioneer Woman's Chicken Spaghetti, this cheesy and rich noodle casserole that I seriously believe is the entire reason that humans were put on this earth. A lot of her other recipes get more publicity, but this one is the unsung hero.

OK, now for the good stuff: Cait and Matt -- tag, you're it!

kiss kiss bang bang! i'm BACK

2011-01-31T19:13:00.000-05:00

Hello!

Remember me?

Melissa?

... the author of this blog?

Guess what?

I kicked my first semester of graduate school in the BALLS, and came out on the other end with a 4.0 GPA!

And I've lost almost 10 pounds since this post was written!

And Scotty, Jewel, Matt and I have started a Firefly/Serenity RPG and I'M the Game Master!

And my parents gave me Netflix for Christmas, so I've been watching movies and TV shows nonstop! (Notable mentions: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World [sogoodsogoodsogood], 30 Rock, Skins [the gut-wrenching and addictive UK version, obviously, not the insipid, rip-off US version], 500 Days of Summer, and a documentary about fonts --yes, fonts -- called Helvetica.)

And Matt is finally moving out of his parent's house this weekend! And he's going to be living in a sweet Victorian mansion with 4 other people, and one of them has a KITTEN! MEOWMEOW!

I know we're only a month in, but I can tell that 2011 is going to be Made of Awesome. And I don't want to make the mistake of not chronicling all of this Awesomeness. So, in case you were wondering if this little blog is defunct -- THINK AGAIN, FRIENDS. This is just the beginning.

christmas at my house

2010-12-29T11:40:00.000-05:00

CHRISTMAS IS OVER D:

But luckily I think the afterglow of present-getting-and-giving and fun times with family and friends will keep me going for a while :D

My family and I only have a few Christmas traditions, but we always stick to them and the holiday wouldn't feel complete without them:

Tradition #1 - We go to the Christmas Eve vigil at church -- this is partly because I am an employee of the music ministry and I have to provide piano accompaniment for the singers, but I'd probably go anyway. I really like to sing Christmas songs.

Tradition #2 - We have a fancy five-course dinner on Christmas Eve with practically the same menu every year -- French onion soup, cornish hens, ham, and creme brulee for dessert. The only thing that changes up even slightly is the sides and the salad. I guess that sounds like it could be boring, but I always look forward to it, maybe because we literally only have this meal once a year. Another important component of this tradition is that it's always just the family -- no aunts, uncles, cousins, or friends. It's awesomely mellow and honestly, that's how I like my Christmas Eve. I'm not religious at all, but I do like to honor the quiet and stillness of the Christmas vigil, if only because it lets me slow down and reflect on the past year.

Tradition #3 - We turn on A Christmas Story at 8:00 on Christmas Eve and we don't turn it off until we go to bed. Then, the next morning, we turn it back on again as we're eating breakfast and slowly getting ready for the annual family Christmas party. I'm very serious about my dedication to this movie. One year I watched it four times in a row before I got tired of it.

What are your favorite Christmas traditions?

this week is crazypants

2010-12-09T13:32:00.000-05:00

I'm neck-deep in end-of-semester grad school assignments over here, which is why I'm not posting much. For the past week or two, I've been slowly and begrudgingly compiling the research for my first graduate-level research paper EVER. Gah. It's due on Sunday and I really should probably already have started writing it, but I'm just so DISTRACTED. Why does the last week of the semester always have to be smack in the middle of the best part of the holiday season? How can they expect me to focus on how teens construct their consumer identities when I could be watching Christmas movies or baking cookies or participating in Reverb 10 or lighting 39 menorahs? (I actually did this. It was 39 kinds of awesome. I'll post pictures next time.) On top of all of that, I got sick for the first time since college and I'm kind of pathetic when I'm sick. I basically revert to my 6-year-old self: helpless and whiny. But I chugged some Theraflu today and I'm hoping to charge through my research so I can get the actual writing part started some time before Sunday.

Needless to say, I'll be a little scarce around these parts until the 19th, when the semester is officially over for me. But I'll be back with a vengeance after that!

See you on the other side :D

P.S. In case any of you were wondering how I did on my first weigh-in of the 10-lb challenge, I'm currently down to

160.0

Four pounds down, six to go! Wahoooooo!

i'm taking back december

2010-12-01T10:37:00.003-05:00

You all know from previous blog posts that I have struggled my whole life with losing weight and regulating my eating habits. There's no harder season for me to deal with those things than the holiday season -- from Halloween to New Year's, all bets are basically off. I just say SCREW IT and figure it's impossible to lose weight/stay sane throughout the holidays anyway, so why even bother trying?

Then I stepped on the scale this morning and saw a number that I wasn't really happy to be seeing. Basically I've gained 10 lbs in two weeks. But this isn't even about a number. I feel worse, bloated and tired. I come home from work limping from the strain of carrying the extra weight around all day -- something that I've never experienced before. I'm busting out of all my clothes, guys, and not in a sexy, Pussycat Dolls way.

Then I stumbled upon this -- Fatty's 10-lb Challenge. Here's what it boils down to:

And so, starting today, I am going to spite the Winter Weight Gain god (his friends call him “Melvin”). I am going to use the (nearly) four weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas to lose ten pounds, instead of putting on another five.
And I’d like you to join me. The solidarity will help.

I'm not officially signing up, but I will be participating on my own and blogging about it here, because it's important to be accountable when it comes to stuff like this. Here's what the weigh-in schedule looks like:

November 29/30: Initial weigh-in
December 6: First week weigh-in
December 13: Second week weigh-in
December 20: Third week weigh-in
December 23: Final weigh-in

So, my initial weigh-in was this morning and the results were pretty disappointing. I'm up to 164.2, a number I haven't seen since May. Unless I want to nudge that weight any higher, the time for change is now.

So how am I going to do it? Along with cutting out all the fast food I've been eating, drinking more water, and eating breakfast, I'm going to be eating mainly grains, fruits, vegetables, and lean protein. I'm also going to dust off my old Pilates DVDs and incorporate 3 core workouts per week, plus at least one trip to the gym per week, for cardio. And so I don't strangle someone when my mom starts making cookies and pies, I'll allow myself one anything-goes meal per week. Based on my previous experiences with this kind of stuff, I anticipate a really big loss of around 3-4 lbs the first week, then a steady loss of around 1.8-2.0 lbs per weigh-in after that. Et voila! At least 10 lbs gone by Christmas!

OK, it looks easy on paper, but it's a tall order. I've never dieted during the holiday season; in fact, that's usually when I fall off the wagon. But I'm going to try, and if I fail... well, you guys will be the first to know :P

wait for it...

2010-11-25T10:47:00.006-05:00

[source]

Happy Thanksgiving, dear readers!

There's snow falling outside (whaaat?) and I'm hunkered down on the couch, flipping between Mythbusters and the Macy's parade, eating a clementine, and generally slacking off until it's time to go to my uncle's house for The Big Family Get Together.

Hope your day is full of good food and good company, and that you've found yourself with lots to be thankful for this year. See you on the other side :D

hearing - 11.22.10

2010-11-22T01:13:00.003-05:00

It's a song for remembering when things weren't so lovely in my parts of the world, for capturing the weird intersection of "I'll never forgive you" and "please come back to me."

...And please don't kill me, but lately every time I hear it I think of Ron and Hermione. DON'T SHOOT PLEASE.

***

The sky looks pissed
The wind talks back
My bones are shifting in my skin
And you, my love, are gone

My room seems wrong
The bed won't fit
I cannot seem to operate
And you, my love, are gone

So glide away on soapy heels
And promise not to promise anymore
And if you come around again
Then I will take, then I will take the chain from off the door

I'll never say I'll never love
But I don't say a lot of things
And you, my love, are gone

So glide away on soapy heels

And promise not to promise anymore
And if you come around again
Then I will take, then I will take the chain from off the door

goin' back to hogwarts

2010-11-18T15:45:00.001-05:00

My life literally revolves around the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows premiere today. It's my friend Dru's birthday -- so, naturally, we're all going to see HP7 at the midnight showing and most of us are getting our costume on (that's my Hogwarts uniform in the picture up there!). To top it all off, I'm running a Harry Potter-palooza Party at the library today, and let me just tell you about what we've got going on: Quidditch tryouts. Wand-making at Ollivander's Wand Shop. Potion-brewing in Snape's Potions class. Getting sorted by the Sorting hat. Every Flavor Beans. Chocolate Frogs. Butterbeer. DIVINATION FOR REALS.

I'm just saying, if I were a 4th grader, I think my mind would be blown. I'm just saying.

Here's a sign I made for Sorting station:

I sorted myself just to be sure the Sorting activity worked, but I didn't need to. I get the same result every time:

The first few times, I was really mad because I thought Ravenclaw was super lame and I wanted to be in Slytherin. But I finally accepted my fate. Ravenclaws get shit done, okay? Check out what the Sorting Hat says about us:

And SUPER MODEST too xD

You can bet that if I were in Gryffindor, none of this Harry Potter Party would even be happening, because instead of busting my butt getting everything organized and set up, I'd be running recklessly into dangerous situations just because Dumbledore asked me to. BURN.

And thus ends the dorkiest post I've ever written.

Exeunt!

the success bullseye

2010-11-16T15:05:00.002-05:00

About a month ago, I digressed from my usual list-y weekend updates to make a (relatively) serious list of small improvements that I hoped to make to my life. Today, let's take a step back and see how I fared.

So, goal #1:

...re-vamp my resumé so I can apply for a Youth Services internship that opened up at another library.

Check and check. I re-wrote my resumé and submitted it for that position. The weeks went by and I didn't hear anything, so I figured they hadn't been too impressed. But last Monday, after a super hectic weekend, I got a phone call from that library, asking me to set up an interview. You guys. I don't want to jinx it, cause don't even know what my chances are, but you guys. If I get another job, this changes everything. I'd have to reassess my path to graduation, my living situation, the state of my finances. Like I said, I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch. But that doesn't mean I can't want them. A lot.

Goal #2:

...re-brand my blog.

Yes, well. You all remember when that happened. It's pretty hard to believe that I had any other blog design besides this one. It just feels right, for whatever reason. Thanks again, Tawni :)

Goal #3:

...make eating healthfully, living healthfully, a priority.

I addressed this goal fabulously -- for about two weeks. Then things got crazy. Then my ability to be mindful of my eating habits kind of went away. Then it came back again for a couple days. And at this moment, I'm probably right back to where I was when I wrote that first post. As evidenced by the fact that I am eating a warm chocolate chip cookie from Wawa as I write this. Aheh.

No seriously, though, I have been tearing my hair out about my weight and my health lately. It seems like nothing can motivate me to be sensible about food and exercise for longer than 2 weeks -- not the fast-approaching date of my 7-day cruise with Matt, not the fact that my pants seem to keep getting smaller every time I wash them, not even the possibility that I may be a bride in 2 or 3 years. Something's got to give at some point. But with all of the things I'm dealing with right now -- work, school, my relationship, my social life, my money woes -- I can't imagine how I'd even begin to deal with something as deep-seated as my body image/weight issues. Bleh!

AND Goal #4:

...go back to strictly reading before I turn out the light.

Total success! Well, there was a week-and-a-half long period where I reverted back to my old ways, but I'm happy to report that I no longer need my computer in bed with me like some sort of weird electronic security blanket.

So with the exception of an issue with which I have struggled my whole life, it looks like I actually kinda did what I set out to do! Apparently I'm a go-getter! Damn, I should have put that on my new resumé.

Like Barney Stinson, I averted mediocrity and hit the Success Bullseye. Nailed it!

risky business

2010-11-09T00:52:00.003-05:00

Oh, my friends. Oh, my friends.

Here's the gist of what happened last week:

My parents went away for four days, foolishly leaving me, a frustrated and bored 23-year-old, alone in the house.

You can bet your bottom dollar that I threw a party.

So here I am, recovering from a hectic four-day extravaganza, definitely wanting to share it with you -- and, of course, I have no pictures. But to be honest, I think the pictures would sort of lie. It'd lend a sort of timeline to the whole experience, a deceptively neat-and-tidy visual representation of what, at some points, felt like a huge clusterfuck.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Where do I even start?

I guess the first thing you need to know is that my parents' three-story home in the South Jersey suburbs became a boarding house from Thursday to Sunday -- some people, like the BFF and Matt, stayed all four days, some, like April and Dru, stayed just one night. But either way I don't think I really realized how intense and exhausting it was going to be.

Everything culminated in a boozy party on Saturday night, which I was hoping would be raucous and full of debauchery, but it was actually pretty tame, and I'm glad that it was, because I had enough of a mess to clean up on Sunday morning without having to mop up vomit. I mean, people got drunk. I'd say that many were buzzed and some were inebriated, but no one was trashed. I certainly wasn't. I was too stressed out about whether people were having fun, or whether we had enough food to go around, to do more than nurse my drink.

When the night was over my mind was buzzing and I felt pretty insecure about how much of a success the whole endeavor had been. I'm still sort of on the fence about it.

Some parts were fabulous like,

the mornings -- when Matt and I stayed in bed chatting and flirting before we'd go downstairs and make breakfast for everyone.
doing party prep with the BFF -- baking/icing cupcakes, juicing a million lemons and limes for the atrociously bad margaritas, throwing on makeup at the last minute before everyone got there -- it's a little taste of what it would have been like to be roommates.
when my sister semi-ironically iced Matt by hiding a Smirnoff Ice in an oven mitt and basically forcing him to look inside.
Sunday morning, when me, Matt, my sister, her friend, the BFF, April, and Dru all miraculously woke up around the same time and proceeded to spend the next four hours lounging around, eating bagels, and watching 16 and Pregnant.

And some parts were decidedly unfabulous, like

when I got woken up in the middle of the night because my sister's friend thought she was having a medical emergency. It freaked me right the hell out for about 11 seconds before Matt jumped in and defused the situation much better than I would have.
when I realized that I didn't have any idea where I would hide the trash and empty bottles, which resulted in me and Matt fighting over whether or not he should have to drive around my town and find a dumpster to hide them in.
the moment that I suddenly remembered that I'd completely forgotten that I was supposed to register for Spring 2011 classes this weekend. I was so upset that it almost ruined my whole weekend.

But we didn't have to go to the ER (thank god, because not a single adult that stayed in the house this past week has health insurance). And I didn't have to make Matt go on a dumpster-hunt, because we figured out a legal (well, more legal) solution to the problem. And it turns out that registration started late Sunday night, so I hadn't even missed it at all, and I was able to get into all the classes I wanted to get into. And although I was still cleaning the house right up until my parents came home today at 5:45 PM, I managed to get the house back in working order.

I don't want to jinx anything yet (my parents have only been home for a couple of hours, so it's too soon to tell), but I think I might have pulled this off. I'm exhausted and I'm going to sleep for the entire day tomorrow, but I think I pulled this off.

Freakin' sweet.

Welcome to the Hellmouth

2010-11-01T17:19:00.002-04:00

But once a year on All Hallow's Eve, Joss Whedon's creations gather for libations and merriment. Vampires, space cowboys, and toys that come to life whenever humans aren't around.... oh my.

Two Big Damn Heroes, and two Big Damn Bad Guys

Two Willows showed up, and neither of them were Regular One.

They day needed his saving expertise.

Someone POISONED the WATERHOLE.

Captions left to right:

Though Reavers are cannibals, I took the night off from flesh-eating and settled for some Jello-whiskey BRAAAIIINS instead.
Reavers aren't very good at playing Kings. River made up a rule that saying the name of anyone in the room meant you had to put your forehead on the table until someone else said a name. She thinks she's so clever.
River and I took a break from trying to destroy one another to enjoy a shot of horrible tequila taken out of a shot glass made of ice. Classy.

I quite enjoyed being a futuristic flesh-eating nightmare barbarian for the night, but it was very exhausting. I think I need to go lie down. And maybe take a couple of Excedrins.

this is halloween this is halloween

2010-10-28T15:07:00.004-04:00

I probably won't have time for a post before Halloween, so I decided to pre-emptively say:

Happy Haunting! Hope you get to show off a sweet costume and eat way too much candy!

If you were curious, here's my game plan for Halloween weekend:

Friday:

Buy some stage makeup and liquid latex and make some fake blood

Hair test run

Fake bloody gashes test run

Make Fruity Oaty Bars to bring to the party on Saturday (which, if you will recall, is a Whedonverse party)

Saturday:

Work (I'm dressing up as Cho Chang) (Shame on you if you don't know who that is. SHAME.)

Reaver Costume Suit-up Montage

Get trashed @ Jewel's

Sunday:

Recovering with scary movie marathon
Trick-or-treat patrol! AKA the best part of Halloween.

And, finally, here's a costume update. I was using this actual movie costume as a reference:

Since then I've been basically obsessed with replicated this costume piece-by-piece. I wasn't having much luck until my friend who is into lolita and morigirl (both are Japanese fashion subcultures) talked me into looking for some stuff online.

I picked this black skirt on eBay because it has an asymmetrical, rumpled look that matches the picture pretty well:

I'm wearing it high on my natural waist with a cinch belt that has some metal details to give it a bad-ass corseted feel. I'm a little worried about this skirt, actually, because I ordered it in a rush and failed to notice that though it's a size 8, the waist measurement is about 2 inches smaller than my measurements. AND the seller's comments say, "NO stretch in waist. Do NOT exceed waist measurements." Oooops. Guess I'm gonna have to suck it in.

And to then I found this awesome gray capelet:

I just got it yesterday and it is so awesome. I am really tempted to take some pictures of me wearing it with the hood up, wielding a bloody weapon... but I'll wait until after Halloween so you can get the full effect. I will say that the picture was misleading because it looks like it would have bluey-brown taupe tones, but it's basically sweatshirt gray. And it's actually way too big (because it was made for a person who is 6'0'' and 50 lbs heavier than me). But I knew that when I ordered it. And it looks pretty damn cool regardless.

So excited.

Big listy re-cap to come sometime next week.

See you on the other side!

'tis the season for terrifying luminaries

2010-10-25T12:08:00.000-04:00

Time for another listy-type weekend update! You know you love these. Don't lie.

Friday:
Fancy steakhouse dinner with Matt
Final installment of Incredibly Depressing Movie Night (we watched Requiem for a Dream and then I cried hysterically, so we agreed to stop watching Incredibly Depressing Movies for a little while.)

Saturday:
Work. Meh.
Out to dinner at this Lebanese restaurant we like
Drank a salted caramel mocha at Starbucks and had a facial tic for the rest of the night.
Sudden burst of productivity due to caffeine rush. Cleaned Huxley the hedgehog's cage SO HARD.

Sunday:
Pumpkin picking hayride at Springdale Farms. It was awesome, but I have no pictures because I forgot to put my memory card back into my camera! Sad face.
Unsuccessful Reaver costume hunt that ended in frustration. Came back home and promptly went on an eBay buying spree. Now 3/4 of my costume is on its way to my house via expedited shipping. Pictures when they arrive!
Pumpkin carving with Matt!

First, Matt cut open and cleaned out the pumpkins. AKA the hard, less fun part. Thanks Matt!

Always such a good sport. Also, sigh. So dreamy.

Next, I applied the pattern.

Err. I kind of lost patience with it after a while and just Scotch-taped it into submission.

Then I used a dangerous little spiky wheel to trace the pattern onto the pumpkin:

This was kind of annoying. But also kind of ingenious.

Then I sprained my wrist and forearm muscles by using a tiny little knife to saw through the pumpkin's very touch and thick skin.

Please ignore my disgusting cuticles. I have never been known for having healthy nail beds.

I might look happy here, but on second glance you will notice that I have THE CRAZY EYES because of how frustrated I am with the dumb little saw.

And then I broke it. Oooops.

Meanwhile, Matt, who has much more upper body strength than I do, had already finished his pumpkin.

I like it!

And here's mine, halfway through the carving process:

BOO! A GHOST!

So it took a lot of physical labor, but I eventually finished... and you know what? I think it was worth the frustration, maybe even worth the soreness in my right arm today! They look pretty damn cool. Check it:

Yay! Terrifying luminaries depicting faces squealing in agony and spirits from the beyond!

Then there was the small matter of what to do with all this:

Pie was out because Just No, and I felt bad throwing it all out, so I decided to roast some pepitas, yo!

Wash the seeds in a colander and pull out any pulp, then spread 'em out on a baking sheet and let them dry for a couple hours (overnight is best, but whatevs).

Then add a bunch of olive oil, sprinkle with whatever seasonings you want (I did Lawry's seasoned salt and a 1/4 teaspoon of curry powder) and mix around until it's all coated. Then roast at 250 degrees for an hour.

Then eat them all in one sitting.

OM NOM NOM.

How was your weekend?

tasting, touching, hearing, seeing

2010-10-21T00:30:00.008-04:00

I am incredibly bogged down with school stuff this week, but I just had to write a quick post to say:

LOOK AT MY AWESOME NEW BLOG DESIGN PLEASE

The time had come for change around these parts. The girl who was incredibly frustrated with being stuck in neutral, who started this blog back in April is -- well, that's still me in some ways, of course, but since then I've started making things happen, engaging with the world. I've started owning my life.

So long, who says i can't? (Cause you know what? No one was saying "you can't" except me. And I'm over that.) Hello, tasting, touching, hearing, seeing. Because that's what I do, and that's what I want to share. What I'm looking at, watching, eating, reading, listening to, doing.

Definitely have to thank Tawni from Forever Design Studio, who was a total professional and listened to me rant and babble about font choices. I dunno about you, but I think she did a kick-ass job. I asked for something "cheerful" and "clean," something "with a five senses theme" and she comes up with this! Outrageous. Truly, truly, truly outrageous.

So, folks. What do you think?

keepin' it low key, keepin' it funky

2010-10-18T17:43:00.001-04:00

Nice, lazy weekend. Matt was at his friend's bachelor party, cavorting in Atlantic City, so I kept things low-key and had an Incredibly Depressing Movie night. Check it:

Well, Doctor Who isn't incredibly depressing. I just happened to pick that up at the library with the other two.

Precious is one of those cases where I think I actually liked the movie better than the book. They're both incredibly upsetting, but the movie does a better job of making you feel like there's hope for the world despite the fact that incest and illiteracy and domestic abuse exist.

I didn't know what to expect with The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. I was familiar with the title because people at the library can't get enough of the book, but no one at the library seems interested in the movie. Maybe because it's a Swedish movie with English subtitles (though a Hollywood remake is in production - bleh). Maybe not. But enough people had told me that the movie was amazing that I just had to know what the fuss was all about. And I don't mind foreign-language films at all, so when I saw it on the New DVD shelf at work, I just grabbed it on impulse.

Anyway, I'm glad I picked it up on a whim, because I really loved it and I may or may not have watched it again with Matt on Sunday. We spent most of the movie either cringing or shouting "WHY ARE THEY RE-MAKING THIS?" in indignant tones.

In between the two movies I took an e-mail and Facebook break and I was very excited to see an e-mail from Tawni (from Forever Design Studio) in my inbox! She started working on my new design over the weekend, so she sent me what she'd done so far -- and I have to say, it's looking AWESOME. I don't want to ruin the big reveal, and I hope Tawni doesn't mind that I'm leaking classified material, but here's a peep-show preview of what's in store:

AWESOME.

Your turn -- how was your weekend?

in defense of teens

2010-10-15T10:58:00.000-04:00

I'm extremely fired up right now.

In my graduate school online class, we're having a discussion about the purpose of libraries, and a bunch of people got on the topic of teens in the library.

It's the same argument over and over -- teens hog the computers and only use them for Facebook, they talk and laugh when other patrons might be trying to get work done, they come in groups and crowd up the library, run around, cause disruptions -- plus some new ones ("Can someone tell me why libraries are offering gaming as an activity? Don't they get enough of that at home?").

First of all, I don't even know how to respond to that comment about gaming. As someone who grew up playing video games, I totally view them as valid source of information as well as entertainment. To me, it's like someone asking, "Can someone tell me why my local library holds a Family Movie Night every month? Don't you get enough of that at home?"

But my overall point is: Why does everyone always pick on the teens? Why do people hate having them around so much? I will admit that I get annoyed at the teens who come to my library sometimes, especially when they blatantly disregard rules like "you can't have food up here" or "please don't move the furniture" -- but guess what? They're teenagers. They're hard-wired to be caught up in themselves, to not fully comprehend the volume of their voices, to be more concerned about whether Madison really hooked up with Nathan than with whether they're disrupting people. I'm going to blow your mind right now: it's not their faults. They can't help themselves. In my experiences, all you have to do is shoot them a look and ask them directly to keep their voices down, and they listen. They might not stay quiet, and you might have to ask them more than once, but they will listen.

I know I have a unique perspective because I want to be a Teen Librarian and I consider myself an advocate for teens and tweens, but honestly. People want to martyr teens when something happens like the completely pointless and tragic losses of 3 teens due to homophobic bullying, but as soon as a couple of teens come into your library you want to kick them all out because they're not "using the library for its intended purpose" (actual quote from someone in my class).

I think what people forget is that we were all teens once, and we were all hard-wired to be self-centered, to not consider others before ourselves. That's something you can't learn until you aren't a teen, until the cocktail of hormones causing you to do things like screech and run towards their friends when you see them, to talk just a little too loud, to be somehow both self-conscious and attention-seeking at the same time, subsides.

Be nice to teens. Because they're going to grow up and be the world one day. I know it sounds trite, but it's true. You don't have to dedicate your life to them or anything, but being a little more forgiving of them? It's a great start.

And now I will get off of my soapbox.

the great wallet debacle

2010-10-11T13:05:00.002-04:00

Friday:
Work
Big family dinner (my sister came home from college AND my grandmother was visiting)
Stop-motion movie marathon

Saturday:
Work
Dinner date with Matt at the Kibitz Room
Flyers game! (We lost. WHATEVER.)

Sunday:
Early dinner at the Greek Agora Festival with Scotty and Jewel
Harry Potter D&D - that's right ... you heard me.
The Great Wallet Debacle (more on this later)

My Friday and Saturday were pretty low-key; I was counting on Sunday to be the Major Event of the weekend. And. Well. I definitely got what I asked for.

So we went to the Greek Agora, which is this big festival at this Greek Orthodox Church in my town. Matt and I met Scotty and Jewel there to peruse the handmade wares:

And to eat tons and tons of awesome Greek food. These fried honey puffs were our favorite:

We accidentally the whole thing.

Naturally, Matt and I went back to buy another container-full. But when I got to the booth, I reached into my bag and realized that something was missing. Something extremely crucial. Yes. My. WALLET.

Now, I have had this wallet for 2 years and I have "lost" it at stores, restaurants, and movie theaters multiple times. I always manage to re-trace my steps and find it again, thanks to the kindness of strangers who don't steal it and make fraudulent purchases. But this time we were in the middle of a huge festival with dozens of vendors and hundreds of people. Devour-The-Honey-Puffs time quickly turned into "FIND MELISSA'S STUFF" time. Matt and I asked every vendor, "have you seen a ladies' wallet? Tan, leather, about yey-big?" No dice.

We even went all the way back to the Wawa convenience store where I'd taken 20 bucks out of an ATM. We asked the clerks, they hadn't seen a wallet all day. So then -- and this is by no means my shining moment, but I'll share it with you guys because this blog is about HONESTY (and pictures of food) --

I. Dug. Through. Their Trash.

And guess what? IT WASN'T THERE.

So I accepted defeat. Matt and I deduced that the only way my wallet could be missing was that I must have dropped it in one of the parking lots, and someone must have picked it up, thought, "Hey! Free money!" and walked away with it. A sad day for humanity. Frustrated, I whined for the whole drive to Scotty and Jewel's place. Before we started D&D, I made the requisite phone calls.

Debit card customer service.

Credit card company #1.

Credit card company #2.

My mom, asking her to get my passport out of its hiding place so I could go to the DMV.

My local bank (they were closed).

Then I settled down for some D&D, figuring it was no use fretting now that it was all taken care of.

Then the phone rang. It was my mom. Probably to tell me some more bad news, like my passport had mysteriously been in a freak shredder accident.

"Melissa, someone from St. Thomas Church just called! They have your wallet! You can call them back at [this number]!"

I half rejoiced, half face-palmed, because hooray -- my wallet's not stolen, humankind had redeemed itself! -- but BOO -- I'd just gone through all the trouble of cancelling all my cards!

So I called back Father Emmanuel, who was very nice and told me he'd lock my wallet in a filing cabinet, and I could come pick it up on Monday.

And here we are. I picked it up today with little incident, then I called the debit card hotline and my credit card companies, who luckily had only put holds on my accounts and hadn't fully canceled them. All my cards got reactivated instantly. And I didn't even have to go to the DMV!

To celebrate my newfound financial accessibility, I did the most cathartic thing I could think of: I bought a new wallet. The old one was obviously a bad seed. Here's Dahlia:

I know she'll never hurt me like the others did.

little steps for big changes

2010-10-08T23:09:00.004-04:00

Things have sort of spiraled a little bit out of control in my parts of the world. So I've been putting some thoughts to the kinds of proactive things I can do to get some of that control back. As always for me, it comes down to baby steps. This week, I will...

...re-vamp my resumé so I can apply for a Youth Services internship that opened up at another library. If I get this it'll mean working for an additional 19 hours a week along with staying at my current job and going to school part-time. And all that extra money would mean that I'd be a little bit closer to being financially independent -- a status which could change a lot of factors in my life.

...re-brand my blog. I've been in contact with Tawni from Forever Design Studio about custom designing a brand new layout for this litttle old blog. I've changed a lot since I wrote the first post in this blog a couple of months ago and I want to take my blog in a different direction. I think a new design will be a great way to aid that transition.

...face the music and make eating healthfully, living healthfully, a priority. A few months ago when I was going to the gym regularly and had just cut meat and dairy out of my diet, I felt pretty great. I was sleeping well, I felt energetic, I felt happier. I want to get back on track, but I know from years of experience falling off the wagon that being too ambitious can really backfire on me. So I'm going inch by inch -- next week I'm hoping to just be more mindful of what I eat and when I eat.

...banish my computer from my bed. I've been having really wonky sleep patterns lately and I partially blame it on the fact that I abandoned my books-before-bed routine in favor of catching up on some episodes of Buffy or How I Met Your Mother. So tonight I officially go back to strictly reading before I turn out the light.

Anyone else working on things inch-by-inch? Or are you an all-in or all-out kind of person?

Of-The-Moment Roundup: 1st edition

2010-10-06T16:59:00.003-04:00

For some reason I feel the need to explain this post. I consume a lot of things on a daily basis -- books, movies, TV, music, blogs, articles, food. To be honest, these things make up a lot of who I am even more than static things like my job, my location, even my relationships. So I just thought I'd do a roundup of what I'm looking at and listening to these days!

Books of the Moment:

Little Girl Blue: the life of Karen Carpenter

I'm a closet Carpenters fan and couldn't resist picking this up when I saw it at the library.

Zombies vs. Unicorns

This one's a Big Deal in YA Fiction right now. It's pretty hilarious, way better than Geektastic, the last anthology Holly Black edited

To Teach: the journey, in comics

I saw this on a "back to school" display at the library and it piqued my curiosity. So far: good, but I don't get why it's in the YA section.

Movies of the Moment:

Girl With a Pearl Earring

I first saw this movie as a freshman in college and I really didn't like it, but in retrospect I think I was just jeals of ScarJo. I saw it again the other day and I quite enjoyed the cinematography (read: Cillian Murphy.)

Kick-Ass

I enjoyed every minute of this movie. I finished the comic in one sitting and absolutely had to watch the movie that same day.

Songs of the Moment:

Belief by John Mayer

I never used to like this one but I finally started to connect to the lyrics recently.

i thank You God by The Western Wind

My sister did this song in All-State Choir and it continues to be one of my favorite songs of all time. This week in particular I just couldn't get it out of my head.

TV of the Moment:

Buffy Season 3
I am loving me some Buffy. I'm slowly making my way through the whole series.

Dr. Who -Ninth Dr.
My god, why didn't anyone strap me down to a chair and force me to watch Dr. Who before? I'm officially hooked, and luckily I have like 31 seasons to catch up on.

How I Met Your Mother
See above, please, except that I'm almost done season 4 and will soon have to wait for episodes on a weekly basis.

Webcomics of the Moment

Goblins
D&D in-jokes FTW!

Blogs of the Moment:

A Practical Wedding
This is my new obsession. Legit.

New German Girl
Heather's spending a year as an au pair in Germany and I'm basically living vicariously through her escapades.

Stephany Writes
She's honest, authentic and thought-provoking. I'm really glad I caught wind of her blog, cause it's one of my favorites.

And, what the hell, just for fun:

Snacks of the Moment:

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins
In honor of fall! Plus I just had one of these from Whole Foods the other day and it kind of changed my life.

Weekend Recap!

2010-10-04T14:53:00.002-04:00

Friday:
Errands (BOO)
Dinner @ Bertucci's with Linds, Dru, and K.
Late-night chatting at my place

Saturday:
Work (BOO)
The Kibitz Room with Matt (I briefly broke my meat fast for a couple bites of their glorious overstuffed reuben!)
Short trip to the mall in search of Halloween costume components
Bowling and game night! (see pictures)

Sunday:
Whole Foods with Mumsie and Pop-sicle for lunch and groceries
D&D FEST at Scotty and Jewel's YES

I knew it was going to be a crazy weekend when K told me she was coming home for the weekend. As the only member of our posse who doesn't live in the area, a visit home from her always means people tend to come out of the woodwork to see her. Maybe also because she is an amazing photographer and always takes these great candids that make all of us look like models. Maybe not. Anyway, she hasn't posted her pics to Facebook yet, so you'll have to settle for mine.

Linds and Dru.

Me and K and a carafe of sangria in the foreground.

This is our favorite game. It's called "Watch K Do Charades."

That's April (not her real name, but she'd approve) on the left and Dru on the right. We were really playing Cranium, but the whole reason we even play that game is to -- wait for it -- Watch K Do Charades.

I managed to completely leave Scotty, Jewel, Matt, and my friend Mara out of the pictures, but that's cause I was too busy hysterically laughing.

Also, we played our second favorite game, Eat Poop You Cat! It's like Whisper Down the Lane, but a billion times more amazing. If you feel like laughing I recommend you visit the website (NSFW in some cases).

How was your weekend?

stave it off, 1-2-3

2010-09-30T14:26:00.001-04:00

It's been a sort of gross three days or so (we're neck-deep in hurricane season here so it's been rainy and windy since Sunday) and although I wouldn't say I have Seasonal Affective Disorder or anything, four straight days without sunshine can get a girl down. While I did my fair share of wallowing yesterday (with Matt over a couple of beers) and it does have its merits, I'm trying to refrain from excessive self-pitying as much as possible. So in order to stave off the cloudy-weather blues, I'm focusing on exciting things that are coming up. I think you know what that means.

IT'S BULLETED LIST TIME

My co-worker Alice (not her real name, but she'd approve) and I just got the go-ahead to plan and run a Harry Potter Palooza Party in November and we are SO EXCITED. And we JUST CAN'T HIDE IT. Children of the library, prepare yourselves for butterbeer (non-alcoholic, of course), pretzel stick wands, Quidditch relay races, and a library-wide dragon egg hunt! (Like I said, SO EXCITED.)
I'm in the process of re-arranging, re-organizing, and re-decorating my bedroom in my parent's house. I'm talking new bedspread and linens, new headboard, new desk, extra storage, the whole shebang. Because unless someone steps up as an anonymous benefactor and decides to deposit several thousand dollars in my bank account on a monthly basis, I'm gonna be living in that room until I finish graduate school. And while the World of Van Gogh theme that I chose 9 years ago worked for me when I was 15, I'm kind of over it now. Dammit. I hate it when my parents are right.
AWESOME NEWS ALERT: Matt gets a whole week of paid vacation time starting in March, and to celebrate the first vacation he's had in two years, he and I are stealing away on a 7-night cruise to the Bahamas. Yeah. It's like. I don't even. I've never been to the Bahamas and I've never been on a cruise and I'm beyond myself with excitement. It's not until May, but that won't stop me from obsessively researching every aspect of cruising, or imagining myself lying out on some white sand beach, or fantasizing about eating steak and cheesecake at midnight before going bowling and nightswimming and then ordering BLTs via room service.

Ahhhh. That's much better. Now if this stupid weather doesn't let up, I think I'll be able to handle it.

But seriously, Weather Fairies. Make it stop or I'll smush you.

gorram ruttin' reavers

2010-09-22T20:42:00.006-04:00

Last Halloween I was working the library's Halloween Party and I dressed up as a friendly witch and painted ghost and Frankenstein faces onto 7-year-olds.

So. This year I'm off on Halloween and I want to be as horrifying as possible. Scotty and Jewel are throwing a Whedonverse party and my costume choice was obvious. I'm going as a Reaver, AKA the brutal and animalistic space barbarians from Firefly.

That's hot.

That picture is the most prevalent image of a Reaver on the Internet. It's like pulling teeth trying to find a good solid shot of one, let alone a female Reaver. So I'm gonna base my costume off of these two gems I found:

[Totally had to remove this one 'cause it came from a site that's infected with Malware apparently. Ugh.]

I like this one because a) it's an actual costume worn by a female Reaver in Serenity (to which the movie production geek in me says: OMGMGMGMGMG) and b) it's a great reference point as to the color scheme and aesthetic that I should aim for.

OK, first of all, that is one badass chick. Second of all, it's really impressive without being too elaborate. I feel like I could put together a costume like this without having to go to a Ren Faire, is what I'm saying.

My search starts this week and I'm little-kid giddy about it. I'll keep you guys updated as I find stuff!

Too soon?

2010-09-20T11:08:00.003-04:00

So two weeks ago one of my co-workers caught me lusting over engagement rings online.

This was her reaction: *crazy grin* UH OH!!!
This was my reaction: *quickly minimizes all windows* I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT! I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!

But I do want to talk about it. I just didn't want to, you know, talk about it with my co-workers. I allowed them to ask ONE question: How long have you been dating? (Answer: 3 years.) They nodded and seemed impressed, but I could have sworn it was the amused, affectionate kind of impressed that really just means they think I'm adorable, all fantasizing about big-girl things like COMMITMENT and DOMESTIC BLISS.

Then my mom stumbled upon what probably looked to her like a guest list because... well, it kind of looked like a guest list (it was really just a list of all of the people we know, though) and according to my sister, thought the whole concept was all sorts of hilarious. Fabulous.

So, Discretion FAIL on my behalf, because I keep on browsing wedding blogs at work and leaving wedding-related stuff all over my house and telling every damn person I know that IT'S ON THE HORIZON. Even though it's not really on the horizon because it'll most likely be another two years before we actually tie the proverbial knot. Maybe I should just keep my mouth shut until it's a done deal.

Sundry Summer 2010

2010-09-16T13:36:00.000-04:00

Pictures from my first summer out in the Real World:

John Mayer concert at the Camden Waterfront with my sister, BFF, and Matt (not pictured).

Lots of D&D with Scotty and Jewel and their kitty:

Kitty liked my Homestar Runner messenger bag:

First Phillies game since 5th grade:

Fun and games in Hilton Head, SC:

And one last hurrah in Ocean City, NJ:

Ah, summer. I shall miss you.

sometimes i write haiku.

2010-08-08T13:46:00.001-04:00

I just got back from my annual family vacation in South Carolina and I can't believe how much energy I have. I unpacked all of my bags, a task I usually drag out for an entire month. Matt's coming over later on, but that's not for several hours and so I have plenty of time to kill.

So I thought I'd write a recap of the four weeks that I went MIA in the blog world.

In the form of several haiku.

So.

Week One - in which I entertain visiting relatives, and see the Phillies play for the first time ever.

Baseball games are fun
but there isn't much to eat
if you are vegan.

So many things to
do in Philly area.
Aunt just wants to shop.

Where are we going
today? Oh, what a shocker.
Shopping. Stab stab stab.

Hm, aunt just gave me
two hundred dollars to spend.
Shopping not so bad.

Week Two - in which I remedy a certain technological issue, and Jewel and I attempt a Buffy season 1 and 2 marathon.

WHOA A NEW LAPTOP.
WOW THE SCREEN IS SO SHINY.
OMG SO COOL.

Oh, Angel. You are
such a creeper. In some states,
this is harassment.

JAMES MARSTERS JAMES MAR
STERS JAMES MARSTERS JAMES MARSTERS
JAMES MARSTERS EEEE SQUEEEEE

[As you can see, that was a very exciting week for me.]

Week Three: in which I help my sister prep for college, and can't stop playing Sid Meier's Civilization 4.

Just one more turn. Then
I'll go to bed. Just one more
turn. SHIT IT'S SUNRISE.

(Why am I)
unexpectedly
nostalgic over shower
caddies and whiteboards?

[OK, had to cheat on that one a little bit.]

Week Four: in which I play D&D, help Linds house sit, and attempt to make my dad a cake for his birthday.

90 percent sure
we're playing this game wrong, but
damn, is this game fun.

Adorable house
makes me want to buy a house.
What magic is this?!

Well, dad, I made you
this nice cake, BUT NOW IT'S GOT
ANTS ALL OVER IT.

[True story. I left it on the counter and the next morning it was completely crawling with tiny, tiny ants. Nice.]

If you decide to leave a comment, feel totally free to haiku. That's right, haiku's a verb now. I just decided.

Catch Me If You Can - Part One: The Wedding.

2010-07-30T00:55:00.003-04:00

In an effort to catch you all up with my life, I'm picking up where my last couple posts left off in a little series I'm calling Catch Me If You Can. We'll see how long I can keep this up until I just decide to go back to posting the boring details of my everyday life in the form of bulleted lists.

***

Things really started to fall apart for this blog around July 4th weekend, when my cousin's over-the-top New York City wedding weekend happened. There was just too much going on, and my computer was dying a slow death, and my relatives came to live with us for a week afterward, and there's just not enough time in the day for shit like that.

But. The wedding. At some points it was really, really fun, and at some points it was just kind of annoying, and there were things that I thought were going to be lame that turned out unbelievably cool and things that I thought were going to be cool that turned out awkward and weird, and there were things I finally saw done right and things I would have done differently were I planning a wedding (like not having it in New York City on July 4th weekend, for starters).

But mostly, it was just great to see all of my favorite family members in one place for three consecutive days.

Maid of honor extraordinaire.

My grandmother, who came all the way from the Philippines.

There was a portrait booth set up between the bar and the dance floor -- things got weird.

There were so many people at this wedding -- but you wouldn't know it from this picture. Those empty pews are sad.

I grew up with this motley crew. Don't let our fancy outfits fool you -- we're a bunch of freaks.

Ahem. Case in point.

Professional pictures are here, and I really hope you check them out if you are even remotely interested in wedding photography, because they're awesome.

it's aliiiiive! ("it" is me. i'm alive.)

2010-07-15T20:20:00.000-04:00

Wow. Here are the main reasons I've been so bloggily absent recently:

My relatives from the Philippines stayed at my house from last Saturday to this Sunday, and we had to entertain them 24/7. Which meant lots of late nights, exhausting shopping excursions, day trips into Philly and New York, and extravagant restaurant meals that left me food-comatose and totally useless. Also, I had to sleep on the couch all week, and although our couches are very comfy, they're not really great in the way of lumbar support. I didn't get a lot of good, quality sleep. Is what I'm trying to say.
My computer is eight kinds of broken. First of all: VIRUSES. AUGH. What kind of an evil creature is lurking in his or her basement creating stupid, terrible viruses that do stupid, terrible things like hijack your web browser so that you can't Google anything and every so often a message pops up saying that I won a prize and it won't let me do anything unless I accept it and give the website my very personal information? To this person I say: Die. Die a horrifying and painful death. Second: I got the dreaded Blue Screen of Death the other day. And we all know what that means. I might as well just throw it in the garbage right now. Third: My computer is Very Elderly. It's on its last legs. Actually, I don't even know if it has legs right now! Maybe it's just dragging itself along on its front legs!

This is way funnier than it should be. Please, someone else tell me this makes them laugh.

So the fate of my blog is up in the air until I can figure out what do with with my sad, old computer. I'm thinking I'm just going to throw in the towel and buy a new one. I need one for grad school, anyway.

Anyways, I just wanted to pop in and say: Hey! I'm not dead! And I've been keeping up with everyone else's blogs even if I haven't been commenting, I swear! Is anyone out there? Hello? ::taps microphone:: Hello??

POST MANIA

2010-06-30T19:51:00.010-04:00

The past week or so has been so so crazy and I've had so little time for anything that I actually like to do, so I'm resorting to blogging in between setting up for programs and checking out patrons and cutting out construction paper seahorses.

(RUN ON SENTENCE MANIA)

(Also, who has two thumbs and loves being a youth services librarian assistant? ::points to self:: This girl.)

(That joke is a lot funnier IRL. I swear.)

(PARENTHESES MANIA)

So, I wanted to talk about what's been keeping me away from my lovely little piece of internet real estate, and what the plan is for when everything dies down. You know what happens next, right?

BULLET LIST MANIA!

Where I've been:

- Cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning. My room, my bathroom, the basement, the den. My relatives from the Philippines are coming to stay for a week and my mother wants the house to be immaculate, I guess so that we can impress them with how quickly our family cleans the house under duress. Because, come on. They'll totally know we only dust the piano when we're having houseguests.
- Picking up tons of extra shifts at work. She works haaaaard for the money!
- Gearing up for this weekend, which is my cousin K's wedding. She's the first cousin to get married on this side of the family, and everyone is going totally sheepshit. The whole process has just been harrowing and never-ending. It's going to be this huge ordeal that involves staying at a hotel in North Jersey with my parents for a whole weekend, and now have to hand out programs and bubbles and candy and my mom doesn't like the shoes I'm wearing and I still have to find a strapless bra to wear with my dress and I don't want to do karaoke at the rehearsal dinner but they're gonna make me and AUGH can't we just show up to the wedding and then leave afterward I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS.

- Fostering my D&D obsession. Despite my initial concerns, D&D has proven to be so. Much fun. It doesn't hurt that we're playing with our really good friends, of course, but there's an aspect of fantasy role-playing that really satisfied something in me. I think it speaks to my inner child who never got tired of playing pretend.

Where I'm going:
- The wedding, obv. Despite all my ranting, I'm sure it'll be fun and/or memorable. And my cousin Maven (not her real name, but she'd approve), whom I haven't seen in years because she lives in the Philippines, is staying with us next week, and that's gonna be totally awesome.
- A Phillies game with Matt, my BFF and some of her friends from college. I haven't been to a baseball game since fourth grade, but how hard could it possibly be to understand baseball? Some guys take turns hitting a ball and running around in a circle. That's the gist... right?
- Down the shore, again, before the oil creeps up the East Coast and coats us all in a Film of Doom.

Also, in July I'm going to do the 30 Days of Me meme and Bloggerstock (which I was signed up for this month but epically failed at remembering to do), and I've got all of these plans for my blog that I've been brainstorming but haven't gotten the chance to implement because at the end of the day I just want to eat sorbet and read Fables and pass out. I just need to get through this weekend. Here goes nothing.

my blog's name: a mixed-media project

2010-06-25T13:01:00.003-04:00

Who says I can’t get stoned?
Turn off the lights and the telephone
Me and my house alone
Who says I can’t get stoned?

Who says I can’t be free
from all of the things that I used to be?
Re-write my history
Who says I can’t be free?

****

So now you know EXACTLY why I chose that name for my blog.

J/K. I'm not sure I even know exactly why I chose that name for my new blog. I know it has something to do with the lyrics and how it spoke to me on my birthday, because I realized then that I'm still a huge geek and a goody-goody and an all-around Nice Asian Girl but amongst those things there's this new other part of me who went to college and learned about other religions, about issues of gender and class, about terrible things that we allow to happen in other cultures, and who let the light of knowledge turn her hard and jaded. This part of me who doesn't believe in heaven or God but still has to go to church every Sunday. This new, patchwork girl who wishes for many things but oftentimes finds herself wishing she still had access to good weed. Or any weed, for that matter.

***

"And it starts with singing this to yourself: 'who says I can't?" Fill in the blank, everybody. Who says you can't? For most people, nobody is saying you can't be yourself. If you put something on and look in the mirror and you like it, go out in it. And when somebody looks at you and they say, 'why are you wearing that?', don't even look down. Be like this: 'I like this, why are you wearing that?' Watch them run away. They'll never bother you again. 'Cause the world is full of bullies. Stand up to bullies." - John Mayer

***

For years I censored my true self for the benefit of others. And I'm still doing it, in real life, biding my time until the day I can stand in front of my parents and more conservative relatives and friends say, I'm pro-choice. I support gay marriage. I don't believe in God right now, and though I think Jesus was really groovy, I sure think the things people do in the name of Jesus can be offensive and just plain stupid. I think recycling is important. I don't eat meat anymore, and when we have ribs and chicken and beef stew for dinner, I feed it to our dog when you're not looking.

But here I'll never censor myself. This is my place to be who I am. Because I said so.

***

back in the saddle

2010-06-22T09:57:00.001-04:00

Urghh... I've been away from the Internet for exactly a week, and there are currently 44, count'em 44 unread blog posts in my Google reader right now. I'm going to work on chipping away at that unreal number until 12:45, when I have to go to work. But for now, here's my week in a nutshell.

- My sister graduated high school. She gave a speech. And I was like, MY BABY'S ALL GROWN UP AND SAVING CHINA!

- I went to see Toy Story 3, which we all know is officially The Greatest Movie Ever Made (no seriously, I don't know if there have been any negative reviews of it except for these two douchebags). The experience was so uniquely Pixar. Half of the time I was laughing unabashedly and obnoxiously. The other half of the time I was a whimpering, moist-eyed mess (I don't let myself cry in movie theaters anymore because I cause a real scene). Those of you who have seen it can probably relate. I had to think about all sorts of inappropriately hilarious things and fan my face vigorously to keep myself from bursting into tears.

- Remember when I got all excited about finding people to play D&D with? Well, on Saturday we started creating our characters and we had maybe a little too much fun with it. Matt's character is an eladrin wizard who wears a prosthetic beard loaded with razor blades (because eladrin can't grow beards, what's up with that?), Jewel's character is an elf ranger with "ginormous knockers," and my character is a halfling rogue with a Napoleon complex. Also, that was officially the nerdiest sentence I have ever typed. Scotty gets off a little too much on being Dungeon Master, I think, as he kept on saying things like GOD DIDN'T SAY YOU COULD CHOOSE YOUR AT-WILL POWERS YET, DID HE? I think we may have created a monster.

- We celebrated Father's Day lounging around the house, doing nothing, as per my dad's request. He wanted Father's Day to be about conserving money and resources, and so we didn't go out to eat or go shopping or anything like that. We all just went about our normal Sunday, which for me meant attempting to clean my room but then just falling asleep for several hours instead.

- I have successfully made it through another week of being incidentally vegan, and I've learned one very important thing:

the one where i talk about myself for like forever

2010-06-15T16:58:00.002-04:00

Remember that award I got, like, a week and a half ago? Welp, I'm finally finishing up the fill-out-the-survey-and-pass-it-on part of the the process. So, without further ado.

The Super ~~Panda~~ Comments Award!

The Rules:

1. Thank person who nominated you. [Check. Totally did that in the afore-linked post.]

2. Copy the award. Paste it in your blog. [Check. Did it twice, in fact.]

3. Link to the person who gave me this award. [Check, but I'll do it again for good measure: Heather's awesome. Go read her blog, stat.]

4. Answer the 10 questions that come with the award. [In progress. See below.]

5. Nominate of few of your favorite bloggers for the award. ['Bout to happen, fool!]

Attention:

Angel from Nerd Angel (who is my soul brother in nerdiness!)

Julie from Roads Are Made By Traveling (whose comments always make me smile!)

Angela from High On Life (who is my blog fairy godmother!)

YE BE TAGGED.

And now, THE MEME. AKA the best part. AKA this took me two days to fill out. AKA ok I'll get on with it.

1. Why do you blog?

Because it's part of me. I've been blogging in some capacity since I was fourteen, in a bunch of different locations. At this point, chronicling my life on the Internet is not so much something I choose to do, but instead more like a compulsion. I couldn't stop if I tried.

2. What are your 3 best memories?
In recent memory: Scotty and Jewel's wedding. So many amazing things happened that weekend, so many friendships were made and re-kindled and so many grievances were aired and forgiven, and there was an abundance of amazing food and there was so much booze and so much laughter.
From my childhood: The summer that my aunt, uncle, and three older cousins from the Philippines came to stay with us for two months. If memory serves me right, it was like a party every day. There was always someone to talk to, something to talk about. I cite this summer as the reason that I love to be surrounded by friends and family and have sort of a phobia of loneliness and solitude.
Ever: Biking with my friend Katie in the Aran Islands in Ireland. The beginning of the bike trail was uphill, and so the second leg of the trail was all downhill, and I decided to tackle the last hill by just letting gravity take me all the way to the end. I don't want to make too big of a deal out of it but suffice to say that I'd been through a very hard year, and I really needed to feel like life as I knew it had a point, and that one amazing ride down that very scary hill basically saved me from spiraling into depression.

3. If you had to change your real name what would you change it to?
In high school one of my friends used to call me "Keiko," after the actress who plays Lane on Gilmore Girls. It got so widespread that kids from younger grades actually thought my name was Keiko. I actually think it suits my personality pretty well!

4. What are five things you can't live without?
I assume that "food and water" don't count, nor do "a car," "sleep," or "oxygen." Even though that would be the truth. Hmm... let's see.
- Books. This is quite literal. Yeah, I read to enrich my mind and to be moved and stuff, but I also rely on books to put me to sleep at night. The few times I've been without a book at bedtime, I tossed and turned almost the whole night. Without books, I wouldn't sleep, and without sleep, I would probably die. I think that's how it works.
- My glasses. I'm insanely nearsighted. I can't see very far at all. If glasses suddenly stopped existing, I'd probably last about five minutes before I fell down the stairs and broke my neck.
- Music. I know this is a cliche, and so I almost didn't include it, but then I imagined what my world would be like without music. And that is a really scary thought.
- Social interaction. I get really weird and sad if I spend too much time by myself. I do like some time to myself to recharge and clear my head, but most of the time I just want to be with my friends.
- Sunscreen. ::jumps onto soapbox:: Every. One. Should Wear. Sunscreen. End of story. ::jumps off soapbox::

5. What are the 4 best books you've ever read?
Young Adult: Paper Towns by John Green
Juvenile: Coraline by Neil Gaiman
Graphic Novel: Watchmen by Alan Moore
All Time: Alice Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll.

6. Tell me something unique and interesting about yourself.
I have a pet hedgehog, and he's like an adorable cactus. His name is Huxley, but he came pretty close to being named Bruce Quillis. (He wasn't bold and daring enough to be named after my favorite action hero of all time, unfortunately. Maybe next time?)

7. What do you love best about yourself?
My signature thing has always been my laugh. I'm told it's infectious. My laugh is like a deadly virus! Moooohoooohaaahaaahaaaaa! (My evil laugh is coming along swimmingly, by the way.)

8. What is the best movie ever made?
Ummm. I don't know if I'm qualified to answer that question. If you asked AFI, they'd say it's Citizen Kane, which makes me think that AFI is on crack, 'cause I've seen Citizen Kane and while I understand how it revolutionized movie-making, I think it's straight-up boring.

What I am qualified to tell you is that my favorite movie of all time is The Wizard of Oz and that in my opinion (disclaimer disclaimer disclaimer!), The Dark Knight was the best movie of the past decade. But that's just me.

9. If you had a "freaky friday" experience who would you trade places with and why?
I'd trade places with Scarlett Johansson solely for the opportunity to do unspeakable things to Ryan Reynolds. No question.

10. What's the best part about being a woman?
We... get prettier-smelling perfumes? (Seriously, I feel bad for guys for having to wear cologne and body spray that smells the way it smells. Also: Axe makes me want to vomit my lungs up. What is the appeal?)

And thus ends my longest blog post to date. Wasn't that fun?

my cautionary tale

2010-06-14T13:32:00.001-04:00

On Friday night, Scotty, Jewel, Matt and I made a grave mistake: we saw Splice. Now, I know I'm kind of an exaggerator, but trust me -- this movie was tragically, painfully bad. To this minute, I can't stop thinking about how confusing, awkward, pointless, cringe-worthy, traumatizing, and poorly written it was. And this is coming from a genuine horror fan who can typically suspend her disbelief for almost anything.

If you were planning on seeing it, I have three words for you: interspecies sex scene. Unless you have a burning desire to find out what I mean by that, please, please, please PLEASE do not spend your hard-earned money to see Splice. Do not be deceived by its inexplicably high score on IMDB and Rotten Tomatoes.

The only positive thing to come out of this experience is that it became the most amazing in-joke of the weekend. We're thinking that this could be a totally epic real-life version of Rickrolling, wherein we tell all of our friends that Splice is the best movie of the summer so far and to go see it immediately, and then laugh the Dr. Evil laugh when we see them again and they're like "DUDE YOU STOLE TWO HOURS OF MY LIFE AND I'LL NEVER GET THEM BACK WHYYY" (But since you guys are awesome, I'm telling you the truth. You shall be spared the torture!)

I'm not going to lie, I'm practicing the laugh as I type this. Moohoohahaha ha HA HA HAAAAA.

graaaaaaiiiiins

2010-06-09T23:13:00.004-04:00

And NOW I will stop talking about high school and prom.

Everything that's new with me:

- I recently decided to go meatless for a while, for ethical/moral reasons and whatnot. I don't want to get all preachy-teachy about it, but I will probably share my rationale at some point.
- I also recently stopped eating dairy because I've developed a pretty wicked allergy. It wasn't pretty, people.
- So now I'm incidentally vegan. It's insane, but it's working -- it's only been two weeks, and feel like Superwoman!
- My boyfriend is understandably troubled by this sudden lifestyle change. Apparently when he told his co-workers about it, they were like, "You know what this means, right? YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO BE VEGAN TOO, SUCKA!" I beg to differ.
- WizardCon in Philly is this weekend and Linda Hamilton and Bruce Campbell and Sir Patrick Stewart and James Marsters are all going to be there BUT I HAVE TO WORK WHYYYYY. Seriously, I've heard WizardCon Philly can be sort of lame, but this was supposed to be my big chance to ~~kidnap~~ ~~make out with~~ meet Spike from Buffy!
- I have to mention the Flyers. They're in the Stanley Cup and tonight's game is do or die and they JUST tied it up in the third period and this is giving me gray hairs. I'm quickly learning that being a sports fan takes years off of your life.

I'm almost caught up with bloggy stuff! I still have to pass on the Super [Effective] Commenter Award and answer the award acceptance survey, and I'm about to start the 30 Days of Me meme that the awesome Heather just started today, but that's going to have to wait until tomorrow. Because the Flyers just went into overtime and I think I might be having a heart attack. Hopefully the Flyers will score soon so I can go to the emergency room? Wish them (and me!) luck.

[Update: Flyers lost. Now my heart is broken. Oh, well. Tomorrow is a new day.]

Prom: a comparative study

2010-06-07T14:51:00.001-04:00

My sister's dress:

Grecian-influenced, a lovely color, figure-flattering -- shit, dye it white and I'd wear this now as a wedding gown. I'm so insanely jealous that this picture is how my sister gets to remember her prom.

On the other hand:

OK, first: CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE SCHOOL BUS. My prom group wanted to be "different" and also cheap (we had 12 couples) so they hired a big yellow bus to drop us off at prom. I don't want to talk about it.

Second: the more I look at this picture, the more I dislike my dress. There's nothing particularly offensive about it, I guess, it's just "meh." Plus, it pinches my under-arm flab and makes me look stumpy. Its purchase was the result of a harrowing day of unsuccessful dress shopping. When you've tried on dozens of dresses and all of them look terrible, you'll settle for anything. Even a $14.99 dress from the clearance rack.

My sister's hair and makeup:

She got her hair done by my stylist Jen, who is a genius. I love that it's soft and not over-styled and yet it's formal enough for a special occasion. Her makeup looks really natural and blended, her eye makeup opens her eyes up like crazy, and the colors are awesome for her complexion. And I swear I'm not just saying all that because I did her makeup :P

On the other hand:

Clown City. What is UP with lip liner? I don't even want to talk about the eye makeup. As you can see, my best friend is suffering from a similar problem (we got our makeup done at the same place), but she looks a little better. My hair is just pathetic. The woman took one look at my short haircut and basically gave up. Then she was like, here, I'll curl it and pin your bangs up. And I was like ARE YOU SERIOUS. THIS IS WHAT MY HAIR LOOKS LIKE EVERY DAY.

Also, the matchy-matchy choker necklace was such. A bad. Idea.

(Also: ugh, the UNDER ARM FLAB. Why didn't anyone tell me about that when I showed them my dress?!

My sister's experience

As far as I can tell, she had a pretty good time. They played all of her favorite songs and she got to dance around like a crazy person with her friends and the food was awesome. Her texts from the afterparty weekend down the shore ranged from pleased to giddy. She came home content, with a hoarse voice from all the talking, laughing, and singing. I'm sure it wasn't the best weekend of her life, but it seemed like she hadn't really expected anything but a moderately good time anyway, so she wasn't disappointed.

On the other hand:

I had never been to a formal dance before, and the only exposure I'd had to prom was what I saw in She's All That and Ten Things I Hate About You and Pretty in Pink. Naturally, it seemed to me that prom was supposed to be this magical night where anything was possible, where latent romances bloom and friendships are defined. I expected nothing short of the best time of my life.

What I got was a group of catty girls who wouldn't compliment one another, a date who was a dud, a shitty DJ (not that any of my friends would dance, anyway), an early departure (we left after 2 1/2 hours) and a rainy weekend down the shore. It was kind of the exact opposite of a magical night where anything was possible. Sure, we were a coed group of eighteen teenagers living in an unsupervised shore house for the weekend, and that fact alone should have created some kind of uncontrollable vortex of drama. But nothing happened. Nobody hooked up, nobody had any heart-to-hearts, there wasn't a wild, debaucherous party, and there was nary a poignant moment to be had. The weekend was at its best, ordinary, and at its worst, completely and mind-numbingly boring. We wouldn't have made a very good episode of True Life: I'm Going To Prom, is what I'm saying.

But now it's just part of the past. I even feel like it shaped me, in some small way, by showing me that sometimes our expectations prove to be to much to live up to, and that it's always better to focus on your friends rather than Boy Stuff. It's one of the times in my life that I look back on with equal parts bitterness and nostalgia, if I look back on it at all. But seeing my sister pose with her friends and pin a boutonnière to her date's lapel and ascend, smiling, up the stairs of the limo bus brought all of the memories flooding back, good and bad. It was a fitting start to a weekend that had me looking back on a lot of good times, and looking forward to making more.

in which i make my flustered and ungraceful return

2010-06-07T10:50:00.000-04:00

HALP! I am drowning reader feeds! And I haven't posted all weekend and a lot has happened happened and I don't know where to start! I've fallen, bloggily speaking, and I can't get up! Just like this puppy! Only I'm not as cute as that! (Almost, though.)

This is what happens when you leave the Internet for four days. Blogging is perhaps the only hobby that keeps on going even when you're not there.

Currently plotting my strategy to get back up to speed. Expect multiple posts today. In the meantime: how was your weekend?

bits of tid

2010-06-03T17:01:00.003-04:00

1) My sister's senior prom is today, and since my prom experience sucked, I'm living vicariously through hers. She's already way ahead of me, as her hair is super classy (whereas mine was too short to do anything real with) and her dress makes her look like Vanna White (whereas mine looked like it was SO TWO SEASONS AGO [probably because I had bought it the year prior]) and she has realistic expectations about what the night will be like (whereas I had watched too many John Hughes movies and am still waiting for some hottie in a white tux to plant a surprise kiss on me in the parking lot at the end of the night).

2) I finally got a haircut and I feel like a new woman! After a brief period of experimentation with other stylists, I went back to my favorite, Jen. And I'm so incredibly glad. She... completes me. She gave me the rocking-est piecey, funky bangs ever. I didn't even know I could pull this shit off. Pictures soon to come, maybe.

3) I got this awesome award from Heather. Seriously, people, these AWARDS. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all of them. This one is called, adorably, the "Super Comments" award, which definitely sounds like a Pokemon trance mode. And check the graphic, yo. Witness the majesty of the Mighty Panda Bear:

Passing the award is my favorite part of this whole process. I'll be tagging some super-effective commenters on Saturday!

4) Until then, I'll be down the shore with my BFF. It's our first shore trip of the summer so we're not going to get too fancy or quirky with our activities: we're gonna walk the boards and frolick in the waves and squish our toes into the sand and bask in the sun and just do Beach Stuff. I'm so excited.

Have a happy Friday, have a great weekend, and DFTBA.

don't stop me now: the best weekend ever

2010-06-02T11:16:00.000-04:00

This is K. She took every single picture you will see in this blog post today. Mine sucked and hers are gorgeous, and plagiarism is for chumps, so I just wanted to give her credit.

Part the First: My best friend graduates. She throws a party. It rocks.

Me and my friend Dru (not her real name, but she'd approve) Top Modeling it up. Note how Dru actually knows how to pose for pictures where as I can only flail about like a fish on the shore.

The scene: picturesque South Jersey backyard.

A freakishly normal picture of my sister and Matt.

An impromptu campfire for impromptu s'mores.

Me and my best friends of seven years. So much love here.

Part the Second: We go to Scotty and Jewel's wedding and we all look so freaking good. Seriously.

Centerpieces, three of which I now have in my house.

That handsome Scotsman my friends and I are standing with is LW (stands for Legitimate Wizard, and honestly I don't know if he'd approve of that name). All of the groomsmen wore kilts to reflect Scotty's heritage, but LW is especially legit in his because he's from Glasgow.

Also, LW does card tricks and for the life of me I couldn't figure them out. The only explanation is that he is Actually Magic (hence the name). Shortly after this picture was taken, he turned that 2 of spades into an ace.

Believe it or not, this cake tasted even better than it looks.

This band completely changed my perspective on the whole band-vs.-DJ thing. They were so, so badass.

Me, Matt, Scotty and Jewel, aka the best-looking geeks in the Tri-State area. Seriously.

Part the Third: The weekend continues at the afterparty and at the afterparty to the afterparty, but I didn't take any pictures because sometimes you want to live life and enjoy the moment without pressuring yourself to document it.

la la life is wonderful

2010-06-01T16:11:00.001-04:00

[image source: http://tinyurl.com/2ayfw8k]

This weekend was fucking epic. It was a maelstrom of activity, the center of which was the beautiful wedding of my friends Scotty and Jewel. Currently, I'm catching up on my reader, then uploading pictures, then writing emails to/posting on the walls of/answering texts from the new friends I made and the old ones I caught up with and the current ones that I love more than ever right now.

I'll post about it later, after I recover. But this is just to say: Hey, guys! It's been a crazy couple of days, but watching your blog posts rack up in my reader made me smile. Guess what? I made a friend who can do card tricks that are so impressive that I'm pretty much convinced that he's a wizard. How was your Memorial Day weekend?

geeky. girly. SPAAARKLYYY.

2010-05-28T11:07:00.005-04:00

I got the best award ever from Angela a couple of days ago.

The Geek Girls Unite Award!
[For girls who are proud to be geeks.]
[Isn't it awesome? And SPARKLY?]

And here are the rules:
List ten geeky facts about yourself and...
Pass this award onto your favorite female geeks!
That's all you need to do!

My geekiness is my favorite thing in the world to talk about, so let's do this!

Top Ten Geekiest Facts About Me:

1, I used the phrase “Joss is Boss” at a dinner party. Everyone stared at me.

2. I read Terry Pratchett.

3. I get all teary-eyed when I hear the Shire theme.

4. I depend on Digg as my primary news source.

5. I own an album called This Machine Pwns n00bs.

6. I read so. Many. Webcomics. For instance,
Basic Instructions
cyanide and happiness
Girls With Slingshots
Questionable Content
Sam and Fuzzy
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cartoons (click the red button!)
Subnormality
Super Effective
Today, Nothing Happened
xkcd

7. I know what Howl’s Moving Castle is.

8. I know what the fifth element is. In chemistry AND in the Bruce Willis/Milla Jovovich movie.

9. And I know what sectumsempra would do to you.

10. My nerd boyfriend and want to get a Corgi puppy and name him or her Einstein, after the genius dog in Cowboy Bebop.

Whee! That was fun. I'm passing the torch to [drum roll, please...] Caity of caity.nu! She's one of my favorite girl geek bloggers. On her front page alone you've got a birthday picture of her in a Nintendo t-shirt, a sweet picture of her Kindle, and a blatant plug for Flight of the Conchords. That's so much awesome I can barely stand it.

Feel free to nab this and pass it on to your friends, as well. This is a really cool award and I want to see it all over the blogosphere.

Have a great weekend everyone, and DFTBA.

looking for a song to sing

2010-05-26T11:46:00.005-04:00

Thing One: If you were a senior in high school and you had to sing a song dedicated your peers and teachers, what song would you pick? Rules that we invented:

No songs from musicals or rock operas or anything with a storyline. Songs out of context = the devil!
Something that can be accompanied by a live piano or guitar -- no tacky karaoke tracks (not appropriate for the venue).
Nothing that conveys overt hostility towards yours peers/teachers. "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" by Green Day is OK, "Fuck You" by Lily Allen is not.
It's a relatively mellow event, so nothing too lively. "Dancing Queen" or "Tik Tok" are probably out of the question.

This survey is to benefit my younger sister, who has been hard-pressed to pick a song for Senior Solo Night, which is in a week. She had a relatively great high school experience, and so I think she really wants to pick a song that shows her appreciation for and warmth towards her friends and mentors. I gave her some good suggestions, most of which she nixed (I can't imagine WHY she wouldn't want to sing "I Shot The Sheriff") some of which she initially liked but then she couldn't find good enough sheet music. So I turn to you. Help me, internets. You're my only hope!

Thing Two: Unlike a lot of people, I basically loved high school. I found my niche early on (band geeks FTW) and stuck to it, and the social structure of my massive public school was too chaotic for a stifling clique-y heirarchy. Everyone basically left each other alone. I had my four best friends who accepted me for who I was (and still do!). I had teachers whom I respected and looked up to (and some I didn't of course). And there were a surprising amount of good looking guys when I was there, so had tons of eye candy to feast upon every. Single. Day. (Something you should know about me is that I was completely boy crazy for all four years of high school. If I wasn't lusting after a classmate, it was some celebrity or a guy I saw at a random Starbucks on my way to a flute lesson.)

Obviously I do look back and roll my eyes at a lot of things, cringe at my attitudes and actions, and sigh with relief that I don't have to wake up every morning at 6 and go be somewhere for seven hours, five days a week. I'm not trying to romanticize it. I think.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that while I'm glad high school is over, it wasn't exactly torture for me. And this whole thing with my sister's Senior Solo Night got me thinking about what I would have chosen to dedicate to my friends and mentors. I can't say for sure, but I like to think it would have been this:

I'm awake, you're still sleeping
The sun will rise like yesterday
Everything that we are now
Is everything we can't let go
Or its gone forever, far away
I hope tomorrow is like today
Don't you go away tomorrow
I don't think I could handle that
You're probably dreaming that you're flying on
Then you start to fall
But then you rise
and shine forever
Don't go away
I hope tomorrow is like today

Tell me what your experience was like! What song would you have chosen as your big fat farewell to high school? And you don't have to follow the rules I set above -- you can be as passive-aggressive (or just plain aggressive) as you please!

five things: a very short dramatic play

2010-05-25T08:32:00.004-04:00

Scene: A phone conversation

Our players:
MELISSA, half-asleep and isn't so much holding the phone to her ear as much as she has the phone balanced on the side of her head.
MATT, similarly delirious.

MATT: I seem to remember a certain person saying they would write a five things post on their blog today.
MELISSA: Ummmm but I am le tired. Plus no one even reads my blog I don't think.
MATT: (mildly offended) *I* read your blog!
MELISSA: But you already know five things about me. You already know ALL of the things about me.
MATT: That's not true. I could stand to know five more things.
MELISSA: (pregnant pause)
MATT: C'mon....
MELISSA: Ugh ok I will tell you five things FINE:

I like cats,
dogs
rabbits,
....ka... kangaroos, and
um, babies.

MATT: Whoa, I didn't know you liked kangaroos.

MELISSA: Yeah I like them! They're cute. They hop all around and stuff and keep their babies in pockets?

MATT: Kangaroos are douchebags! They kick people in the face.

MELISSA: Oh...then I don't like them anymore. I changed my mind; I like ... fish.

MATT: What kind of fish?

MELISSA: .....blue fish.

MATT: .... it's time to go to bed, isn't it?

MELISSA: zzzzzzzzz.

look! more flowers!

2010-05-24T03:26:00.002-04:00

OK, let's pass this award to five bloggers, before the weekend is over. (I know it's 2 AM, so technically the weekend is over, but goddammit, today isn't over until I go to sleep!)

So here it is in all of its glory: THE SUNSHINE AWARD. BEHOLD.

The Sunshine Blog Award is awarded to bloggers whose positivity and creativity inspire others in the blog world. The rules for accepting the award are:

1. Put the logo on your blog or within your post

2. Pass the award to 5 bloggers

3. Link the nominees within your post

4. Let them know they received this award by commenting on their blog

5. Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award

6. Share 5 things about yourself

So! First things first: my five. I tried to adhere pretty hard and fast to the concept of recognizing people for their positive attitude and their creativity, so I hope this award is meaningful for those of you who I've linked. And the award goes to:

Heather of Boyfriend Challenged. Because she's hilarious and because this post made me want to stand up and cheer. It's basically the "We Are The Champions" of single ladies.
Ally of Fourth-Grade Nothing. Because I always look forward to her posts. There's a real satisfaction that comes from learning way more than you needed to know about Strawberry Shortcake.
Ethony of Wicca, Tarot, Photography, Books and My Life. Because I've just been to her online photo gallery and it makes me want to try harder to create beautiful things.
Amber of Nostomanic. Because her blog is sheer, blinding brilliance. If you don't believe me, just go read her current post about the untapped potential of The Goblin King's bulge. Then we can talk.
Ashley of You're The Charlie Browniest. Because you know that one friend you have who can turn the most mundane thing into a hilarious anecdote and/or rant? She's the internet version of that.

Later today I'll be posting five things about myself. For now, I'll just say that if you haven't checked out any of these fine foxy ladies yet, then go right now or I don't know if we can be blog friends anymore. I'm serious. OK, I'm only a little bit serious.

Thursday Five: Smooth Sailing

2010-05-20T21:29:00.007-04:00

It's been one of those pleasant, busy weeks where Some Things Go Wrong but, by and large, Things Are Pretty Good. Nothing groundbreaking (no graduate school acceptances, no Publishers Clearing House knocking at my door with a giant check) but nothing too devastating either (no funeral services to attend, no dogs bringing baby bunnies into the house as a gift). Just smooth sailing, small pleasures, and personal victories. It's a good week to participate in MannLand5's Thursday 5 for the first time.

The graphic:

Did I ever mention that I love daisies? They're my favorite wild flower.

The rules:

Today's the day where we (those of us that want to) post 5 things that have made us

Joyful

Giddy

Excited

Thankful

Jubilant

Just plain ol' happy this week!

And then you link back to Keely, of course. (whose blog I just discovered via this meme).

And here's my five.

So I feel kind of like a fraud for being excited about this, but THE FLYERS ARE MAYBE GONNA GO TO THE STANLEY CUP WHAT. Being Matt's girlfriend basically necessitates becoming a Flyers fan, so I've started to really warm up to the sport over the years. The playoffs have been really fun to watch, and it feels weird to suddenly be a sports fan, but the more I think about it, the more it's just another branch of geekdom. At least that's how I'm going to look at it.
Ever since I started listening to Book One of Harry Potter on audiobook in the car, I actually look forward to driving around. I haven't re-read any of them in years, and I've forgotten so many of the details and how straight-up good it is. It's honestly like I'm reading the series for the first time.
My Very Geeky Friend from the library just turned me on to Fables. I really love fairy-tale retellings and anything having to do with inserting characters from mythology and classical literature into modern-day settings, and from what I can tell so far, that's what Fables is all about. So I'm really excited. Also, same Very Geeky Friend invited me to her weekly True Blood/Buffy Night -- it starts in June when season 3 of True Blood starts ... so I have until then to get completely caught up on the series, I guess...
I have one sentence (...fragment): Neil Patrick Harris guest starring on a Joss Whedon-directed episode of Glee. Ultimate win.
I found out that I got an award from the awesome Nikki of City Soliloquy! Thanks Nikki, if I could give it back to you, I would. I'll be passing it on to 5 more bloggers tomorrow. Hooray for spreading the love!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-05-19T11:05:00.008-04:00

insane in the membrane: the story of my weekend

2010-05-17T13:09:00.003-04:00

This weekend Matt and I descended upon Lambertville, NJ, a small, historic town near our alma mater that is known for its art community, antique shops, and all-around quaintness. It's the kind of place that I guess people go to retire. Honestly, after spending the weekend, now I kind of want to live there when I retire. It was awesome, is what I'm saying.

Some of the highlights of the trip:

The FOOD, OMG. We just picked restaurants at random but we happened to end up at the best places in town. And the breakfast our B&B served was insane in the membrane. Warm scones with blueberry preserves, fresh fruit from the farmer's market, and blueberry-cornmeal pancakes from scratch. I nearly died.
Touring River Horse Brewery and facepalming (in amusement) when Matt insisted on asking the geekiest questions like "What sanitizer do you use on the bottles?" and "What kind of machine you use to flash-chill the beer?"
Stumbling upon a secret room in an otherwise typical curio/antique shop that was literally jam-packed with pop culture memorabilia, records, action figures, old magazines (from Tiger Beat to Rolling Stone), pulp fiction books, and kitschy toys. Matt, who is a collector of classic rock LPs, found original presses of Are You Experienced by The Jimi Hendrix Experience AND Aqualung by Jethro Tull and he bought them both for FOURTEEN DOLLARS.
The fact that the B&B had A Mighty Wind in their DVD collection. It was slightly less exciting when the DVD crapped out just before all the good stuff happens, but still. It's the concept.
Discovering that I fucking love B&Bs and I don't care who knows it. All I can say is that instead of being worried that it would be lame and annoying and I'd have to make chit-chat with pretentious Princeton retirees [note: I actually did have to do that, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be], I should have been more concerned with the monster that a B&B would unleash in me. As soon as we got to the house and dropped off our bags I dragged Matt downstairs into the common area for way longer than necessary in the hopes that we would run into the owner again or come across another couple. So, yeah -- the B&B experiment went, like, outlandishly well.

And now. Pictures.

Here's the pop culture room I mentioned before. I seriously had to catch my breath when I first walked into this room. It's like Geek Heaven.

This is Peddler's Village, where Matt and I had dinner and window shopped. I took this picture while he was buying us some ice cream.

Our room. It was way bigger than it looks and so cozy. That bed was the most comfortable bed I've ever slept in. I have to admit, though, when I saw the flowered wallpaper I had a bit of a moment from the episode of Gilmore Girls I talked about last time. You GG fans know what I'm talking about. And no, there wasn't actually any foil in the paper.

I just needed you to know that our toilet paper looked like this when we got to our room. This is the level of service we received, people.

I can't believe I'm even posting this, but I just wanted to show you how Matt has this uncanny ability to ruin pictures of us.

See?

And of course, the obligatory food picture. This is Matt's order of Chocolate-Banana Coconut French Toast. I bet you can guess what happened approximately 1 minute later.

Gone.

don't you want to ring the bell?

2010-05-14T14:49:00.006-04:00

Matt and I are taking a trip this weekend for our third anniversary. There's going to be brewery-touring and sculpture garden-traversing and delicious food-eating and bubble bath-taking and THIS:

That is the Martin Coryell House, a B&B in Lambertville, NJ where we'll be spending the night in what appears to be absurd amounts of comfort and luxury. I admit that I'm somewhat worried that this will be like that episode of Gilmore Girls where they get lost on their US road trip and end up at this B&B that Lorelai's friend used to own but got taken over by a crazy cat lady named Ladawn.

Also, my friends K and K from college went to a B&B in the Catskills for their anniversary, and they told me it was extremely harrowing and scary because it was like a creepy little cabin in Deliverance-type woods that was seriously COVERED in pictures of little Rip van Winkle men.

So! Based on those impressions, I'm just a little wary. But mostly I'm just excited that Matt and I get to stay in such a nice place for our anniversary.

Anyone with similar (or, perhaps, more positive) B&B experiences is definitely welcome to share them. People, I need to know whether we're doing the right thing or if we should go ahead and skip it, maybe book a night at the Marriott instead.

In any case, I'll be back soon with plenty of pictures and hopefully nice things to say. Have a great weekend, everyone, and DFTBA.

true life: i watch way too much true life

2010-05-13T14:31:00.004-04:00

Today Lindsay (my BFF) and I were texting back and forth while simultaneously watching MTV's daily one-hour block of True Life (a tradition spanning several years) and the following exchanges occurred:

Oh P.S. - The first episode was "True Life: I'm a Fanboy" and the second was "True Life: I'm Ex-Amish."

BFF: omg wtf THIS kid has a gf!? ["this kid" being the wannabe low-budget horror filmmaker]
Me: lollll i am just as surprised as you

BFF: awww awk nerdlove [sent when the two Power Rangers geeks went shopping together and shared a cute-but-cringeworthy moment]
Me: HEY! nerdlove is beautiful

BFF: this is SO WEIRD [sent when the wannabe low-budget horror filmmaker debuted his short film about a person who wakes up in the middle of the night only to find that Freddy Kreuger has possessed his penis]
Me: i'm afraid. mama? are you there, mama?

BFF: [just before the ex-Amish True Life starts] yesss i don't think ive seen this one. i was confusing it with that other documentary we saw i think.
Me: ohhh yeahhh. man, you know you're weird when you don't know which amish-based thing you're about to watch cause you've seen too many.
BFF: hahahaha oh mannn, and i made fun of the fanboys??

Me: [upon discovering that the Amish speak a different language sometimes] whattt is this language! this is new to me!
BFF: oh it's like german. i forget actually if it's regular german or an amish version. but yeah.
Me: oh man that didn't sound german at all! but i guess he wasn't using very german pronunciation
BFF: right yeah i'm sure it's been modified over the years. i know bc i read those religious romances written about amish people
Me: WHAT OMG I NEVER KNEW THAT ABOUT YOU dude i'm gonna call VH-1 right now and you can be their amish enthusiast for "i love the pennsylvania dutch"
BFF: shut uppp lollll

Best friends. You can learn everything there is to know about their ways in a month, and after a hundred years, they can still surprise you.

Okay, that may or may not be a quote from LOTR that Gandalf says about Hobbits. But I still think it applies. I never ever ever knew that my best friend had an Amish romance fetish. And now I do. I think I need to go sit down.

perseverance and patience

2010-05-12T11:29:00.001-04:00

I'm feeling much better about life now that I've dropped the piss-poor attitude that resulted in my last post. I feel like everyone has a right to occasionally lose all perspective and indulge in straight-up wallowing, but I'm reading it back over and feeling kind of silly for writing all that stuff about how I am not a unique snowflake and how I'm lazy and bad at video games. That's not really a fair representation of my life right now.

I need to snap out of feeling like I failed. So I lost direction in college and failed a couple classes. Shit happens. So I'm just now figuring out what I want to do with my life. Well, at least I'm taking steps to have the life I want. So I live at home and haven't started earning a salary yet. So what? Who says you have to be financially independent by 23? By 25? I'm the only one who's been putting pressure on myself to move along faster than I have the means to move.

My parents are insane for letting me live with them for as long as I need to, but they've insisted on it so I'm not going to argue with that. In the meantime, I'm doing everything I can to create an adult life. I've set my sights on my career path and I'm speeding off in that direction. I have a job I love and a cool boyfriend and my best friends are awesome and I get to live with my hilarious sister. And that's a lot.

These are the things I have to remember when I'm feeling inadequate. This needs to be my manifesto for the times I feel like I haven't done anything worthwhile in these past 23 years. Because while my life might not be remarkable, it's not forgettable. Instead of feeling like shit for having a boring life right now, I should remind myself that this is just the part where I lay the foundation for the outrageously awesome life I'm going to have soon.

And the rest is just perseverance and patience.

tyler durden, you're just a big fat bully

2010-05-10T18:01:00.002-04:00

You know how some days you just feel completely mediocre? Maybe you see some YouTube video of a child genius who can do calculus and stack cups and paint replica Van Goghs all at the same time and it just makes you feel like you've failed at life? That's kind of been my past two days. Examples:

I went to a concert for high school jazz prodigies, which was pretty cool, but mainly just served as a reminder that I used to have some real musical talent but I squandered it away because I just didn't have the dedication or the skillz and I could never be bothered to practice.
One of the high school jazz prodigies happens to be my sister, who isn't even really a jazz vocalist but worked extremely hard to move past her vocal comfort level for several weeks just so she could do an amazing job at this one performance. On the other hand, I am sometimes too lazy to get myself a glass of water.
My best friend is so good at the flute that she's in the Navy band and in a couple of months she is going to move to an international naval base in Italy and live there for five years being a professional musician. In contrast, I have been living with my parents for almost a year.
My cousin is about to study abroad in New Zealand for three weeks and then after that she is moving to Manhattan for an internship with the School of American Ballet. Why is everyone in my life so much cooler than me?!
Meanwhile, I recently learned that I can't even make it to the second castle in Super Mario Brothers Wii on my own without dying a billion times and using like 6 "continues". I CAN'T EVEN FUCKING BEAT A VIDEO GAME. COME ON.

I think last week I was so manic and proud of myself for getting into graduate school that a come-down was inevitable. It's like someone shined the harsh light of reality right into my face: you're not that special just because you got moved up the wait list and into a graduate school program. Thousands of other people got in to grad school this year too. It's like my own Tyler Durden has surfaced and he's like "YOU ARE NOT A BEAUTIFUL OR UNIQUE SNOWFLAKE. YOU ARE THE SAME DECAYING MATTER AS EVERYTHING ELSE," except that this isn't Fight Club, so I don't feel like I've transcended the mundane through nihilism, I just feel like crap in a bag.

Guh. This sucks.

P.S. OK, I feel way better now -- I found out that Angela (who I'm officially naming my blogging fairy godmother) nominated me for 20SB's Featured Blogger for the month of June! And I was like, say WHAT? I don't quite feel like I've paid my dues enough to win the title, but the nomination really made my day. And, I guess, if you like what you've been reading here over the past couple of weeks, you should definitely feel free to go second her vote.

memes and mommies

2010-05-09T20:35:00.021-04:00

I just discovered Sunday Stealing, which is a meme made up of only "stolen" memes that they collect from all over the blogosphere. It's very meta. I think. Sometimes I'm not quite sure I know exactly what "meta" means. But anyway. Let's DO this.

1. What's your favorite Dr. Seuss book?

How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

2. If you could live in any home on a television series, what would it be?

When I was younger, it was definitely Clarissa's room in Clarissa Explains it All. Now I just want to live in Lorelai and Rory Gilmore's house. And I want a town troubadour and the Bracebridge dinner and Luke's diner too. Is that so much to ask?

3. What's the longest you've gone without sleep?

Hm. I'm thinking of a specific occasion (but that's another blog post) and I think it was like, 25 hours or something. And all I remember is feeling like walking death.

4. What's your favorite Barry Manilow song?

OH MANDY WELL YOU CAME AND YOU GAVE WITHOUT TAAAKING

5. Who's your favorite Muppet?

Beaker!

6. What's the habit you're proudest of breaking?
Up until a fairly advanced age, I used to eat my own boogers. Yeah. Really, really glad I stopped doing that.

7. What's your favorite website?

According to my browser's history, it's Cracked.com. I would agree.

8. What's your favorite school supply?

Highlighters!

9. Who's your favorite TV attorney?

Marshall!

10. What was your most recent trip of more than 50 miles?
I drove up to my friend's apartment in Astoria, NY to perform some Broken Heart First Aid. It was a hard weekend -- but worth it. Incidentally, that also marks the first time I extensively worked on a Mac and realized they weren't Enigmatic Mystery Machines.

11. What's the best bargain you've ever found at a garage sale or junk shop?
Wow, I don't know if I've ever been to a garage sale or a junk shop. I guess the closest thing is that once, I found an amazing chartreuse lounge chair at a Goodwill for like $50, but... I didn't have the money or any reason whatsoever to buy it. Sigh.

12. Where were you on September 11, 2001?
I was in 9th grade at the time, so I was at school. I hate to say that it wasn't that hard of a day for me -- I was only 14 and although I could tell that it was very bad (my teachers were crying and many people went home) I didn't quite understand what was going on until I came home to an empty house and saw all of the footage on the news. Then my sister, 9 years old at the time, got back and I couldn't believe how happy I was to see her alive and I told her what happened and we just hugged and cried until my mom came home. God. Not a great time.

13. What's your favorite tree?

Weeping Cherry. We used to have one of these in my backyard and I spent a lot of summer days leaned up against it reading. Then my dad chopped it down. Oooh, I'm still sore about that.

14. What's the most interesting biography you've read?
The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls (or at least, that's the one that stands out the most right now).

15. What do you order when you eat Chinese food?
Chinese isn't usually my first choice, but sometimes I get wicked cravings for sesame chicken.

16. What's the best costume you've ever worn?

Asian Juno!

17. What's your least favorite word?
"Clumpy." Augh. Ew. Gross. Blech. Gag.

18. If you had to be named after one of the 50 states, which would it be?
Alaska. Because of the John Green book, not because of any particular allegiances or affiliations. Cough.

19. What's your favorite bear?
Ummm. Gummi.

20. Describe something that's happened to you for which you have no explanation.
Ok, let's see if I can explain this. Once my friends and I were walking the Ocean City, NJ boardwalk and another group of girls were walking towards us. As we crossed paths, one of the girls ran into my friend Karen, hysterically screamed at her like she had just seen a ghost, and then ran away. We have NO IDEA why. We don't think it was a prank or a dare, since it's not even like she and her friends subsequently pointed and laughed in that "I-can't-believe-you-just-DID-that" way. It was totally bizarre.

21. If you could travel anywhere in Africa, where would it be?

Marrakesh, please!

22. What did you have for lunch yesterday?
A large #1 meal at Chick-Fil-A. That's the chicken sandwich, for those of you who aren't tragically addicted to Crack-Fil-A like me.

23. Where do you go for advice?
My cousin Abbey, my parents, my friends, my sister, and occasionally the Internet.

24. Which do you use more often, the dictionary or the thesaurus?

Thesaurus!

25. Have you ever been snorkeling? Scuba diving?
Snorkeling, yes -- on a tropical island in the Philippines, no less! It was THE BOMB. I've never been scuba diving, but I am dying to learn.

Okay -- last thing is a quick weekend update:

I came a little bit closer to making a decision vis-a-vis the Mac vs. PC thing. Thank you for your comments/input!
I went and saw Iron Man 2 and thoroughly enjoyed it, and now I'm all fangirl squee-ing over the potential Avengers movie that Joss Whedon is allegedly maybe possibly rumored to be directing GAH.
I celebrated Mother's Day with... my mom. And my sister. We went shopping and helped her pick out an awesome purple dress for my cousin's July wedding. Hooray for my mommy. And your mommy. Mommies in general, really.

What about you? Did you (and/or your mom) have a kick-ass weekend?

what i'm wishing for

2010-05-07T11:22:00.019-04:00

Ever since I got into grad school I've been unnecessarily celebrating whenever possible. Yesterday my sister and I went to the Cheesecake Factory and I dropped like 70 bucks on lunch just because I felt like eating a special "CONGRATULATIONS" meal. I went to the mall with Matt on Tuesday and bought myself 5 new pairs of underwear from Victoria's Secret, because underwear is obviously essential to the graduate school experience.

What I'm trying to say is that I'm in an "I'm worth it" kind of mood lately. And when I get into that kind of mood, I get really, really materialistic. I start remembering all of the things I wanted to buy that I couldn't afford or didn't really need that are somehow suddenly worth getting now because hey, I'm awesome!

And because you care, this is my "Suddenly Worth Getting" Wishlist.

An Erin Condren Life Planner. When I was in undergrad my planner was my lifeline. But since I graduated, things have been pretty low-key and thus I haven't really needed one lately. But things are COMPLETELY different now. I'm going to have assignments! Meetings! Registration deadlines! Not to mention a pretty hefty work schedule! I need a planner to sort all of that stuff out. And clearly I need a planner that can be customized with my name and the photo of my choice and comes with nifty stickers and bookplates and 2 matching notepads that costs three times as much as a planner from Target or Staples. Clearly. [Edit 5/8 @ 11:32 AM - I went ahead and bought one because they happen to be on SUPER UBER SALE right now. Hooray for semi-impulse purchases!]

A new iPod and a new iTrip. Hey, I'm going to be a commuter student, and it's a one-and-a-half hour drive all the way up to campus. I'm going to need something to play my audiobooks and my music so I don't go crazy on the way there and the way back. Because let's be honest, the radio just isn't cutting it these days. I've listened to "Eenie Meenie" by Justin Bieber feat. Sean Kingston way more times than I care to divulge here.

A Flip Mino HD video camera. I ... uh. When I walk to class, I'll need to, uh. Film myself. So I can remember how to... get there. Okay, I can't really think of a reason why I'd need this for grad school, but I've wanted one for years.

An Apple MacBook. This is the big one, the one I'm very seriously considering. My little old Dell has been a such a trooper, but I really do think I'm going to need a new laptop for grad school. And I've been thinking about making the switch to Apple for a couple of months now. The dealbreaker was yesterday, when a bunch of my co-workers overheard me saying that I wanted a new computer for school and they all recommended Mac. They said that on the youth services track, they'd had to do a lot of multimedia projects that a Mac would have been perfect for. I'm hoping to be able to scrounge up the money to buy one by July or August. And I'm also hoping to panhandle at my parents to help me out a little -- but my dad thinks Macs are disgustingly overpriced, so I'm not sure if that's going to go over well.

I'm curious -- what's on your wishlist these days?

Alternately: Do those of you who use Macs have a good solid list of pros and cons when it comes to working on Apple computers?

~~And even more alternately-er:~~ ~~Did anyone go to a midnight showing of Iron Man 2? What is the verdict?~~ ~~I'm thinking of suggesting that as our Friday night date and I wanted to see if people liked it.~~ [Edit 5/8 @ 8:39 AM - We went to go see it and we loved Robert Downey, Jr. and the sidelong Avengers references, and we didn't love some other things, but it's a superhero action movie directed by the guy from Swingers so I'm not being nitpicky.]

Have a kick-ass weekend everybody, and DFTBA.

make my dreams come true

2010-05-05T12:20:00.012-04:00

[First things first: Happy Cinco de Mayo! I am celebrating by cleaning my room, watching BBC's Life, and eating cookies. Later: Work! Olé!]

So here's what happened yesterday:

I got into graduate school.

I realize that I have never mentioned in this blog that I had any ambitions whatsoever to go to graduate school. So let me explain.

No, there is too much.

Let me sum up.

I want to be a librarian. More specifically, I want to be a youth services librarian. And I've been taking a lot of steps to achieve that goal. Many of those steps entailed getting as much hands-on experience as I can working in public libraries and school libraries. But the biggest step I took was applying to graduate school for my Master of Library and Information Science (or MLIS). Experience is important -- really important -- when it comes to getting hired as a librarian, but the MLIS is the golden ticket. It's basically the prerequisite for every library job beyond support staff.

I applied in December to just one school. In retrospect, that could have been a huge mistake, putting all of my eggs in one basket like that. And at first, it really seemed like I had fucked myself over majorly. Because the deadline for admissions decisions came and went, and I hadn't heard a thing back from my One and Only School. No acceptance. No rejection. Just dead silence.

I was convinced I'd overestimated myself. I started having tons of negative thoughts: How could I have been so stupid to just apply to one school and assume it was in the bag? This university is ranked #6 in the nation for overall library science -- #3 for youth services. They wouldn't want me, a fresh-from-undergrad wannabe whose GPA barely met the admissions standard, whose GRE scores sucked balls.

Fed up, I turned to the Internet, and I found some forum where people who had applied to library school were discussing their school decisions. I found out that the people who'd applied to my program had already received their acceptances via email. It hit me like a train. I'd been snubbed. I hadn't even gotten a rejection letter.

I was so embarrassed. All of my fears about my shortcomings were true, apparently. I got really upset. Then I got mad. Then I started trying to figure out a Plan B.

This was all about a month and a half ago. Since then, I'd been struggling with where to go next. I half-heartedly filled out another application to another popular MLIS program whose deadline hadn't passed. I looked in vain for more support staff positions in public libraries. And I became more and more panicked about how my career was going to fall into place.

Then yesterday happened.

I was eating breakfast and watching Sabrina the Teenage Witch, waiting for my computer to start up and wondering how it is I never realized what a horrible show Sabrina the Teenage Witch was. I absentmindedly checked my personal e-mail, the address that I can't give out to employers because it's from when I was 15 and thought "liketotally" belonged in an e-mail address.

Then I logged out of that account and signed into my "offical" e-mail, the one I put on my resume and give to stores because I'm too embarrassed to give them the other one. I chomped down on a strawberry and bit my tongue and cried out in pain. Then, dabbing at the inside of my mouth, I glanced at my email and I saw it.

[Fancypants] University MLIS wait list - space available for you this fall

My jaw dropped. I blinked. I read the line over and over and over. I clicked on the subject line.

You are the next person on the wait list for the [Fancypants] University online MLIS program so we'd like to offer you the opportunity to begin your online studies this fall if you'd like.

My heart started pounding. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I'd been on the wait list the whole time? Why hadn't I gotten a letter or an email letting me know? Was this real? Or was it spam? Or maybe a cruel joke from the admissions department? I read on.

The new student orientation will be in late August at the [North Fancypants] campus ... Please let me know ASAP if you'd like to join the fall 2010 cohort so we can help you get registered and send you detailed information about orientation. Classes begin Wednesday, September 1st.

Oh my god. This was real. This was real and I was accepted. I am accepted.

I am going to graduate school, to attend one of the most high-ranking and well-known MLIS programs in the country. I am going to be a youth services librarian.

Of course, I ran around my house screaming and I called my mom and my dad and I frantically texted my sister and my best friends and Matt. Then I went to work and told my co-workers and they were so excited for me. I'm so excited for me. I mean, soon the boring stuff sets in: applying for a loan, registering for classes, learning to deal with bullshit university bureaucracy.

But today I'm not thinking about any of that. Today I'm just basking in the warm glow of Getting What You Wanted. Today, this is me:

ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAAAIIIR

2010-05-04T16:24:00.001-04:00

Today I received my first award, from the sweet and sassy Angela of High on Life. Check out my Sweet Blog Award:

I AM CANDYBEAR. BOW DOWN TO MY CUTENESS

ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAAAAIIIIR

So here's what happens now:

*give this award to 10 sweet and friendly bloggers,

*make a post about the award including the picture and mention the person who gave it to you,

*put the award on your blog, and

*let your nominated 10 know you've awarded them by leaving a comment!

Even though I've only been at this for two weeks, I've already met so many sweet and/or friendly bloggers... but I still don't think I can think of 10. It's going to have to be 5. And the lucky 5 are:

Thanks for being awesome, seriously.

And P.S. - Happy Star Wars Day. May the Fourth be with you. Hee.

the final verdict

2010-05-03T10:42:00.008-04:00

So, how did my weekend turn out? I know you've all been waiting for the answer with bated breath. Let's take a gander:

CONS

The cons list can be distilled into one huge con: It was 90 degrees this weekend, which is an affront to all that is natural and right. It shouldn't be 90 degrees in New Jersey during the first weekend of May. It just shouldn't.

Some of the ways this detail affected my weekend negatively:

1, We couldn't turn the A/C on because it's not supposed to be this hot like ever again, so I had to try to sleep in the sweltering heat, which resulted in me waking up completely naked on top of my covers. Sometimes I take my clothes off in my sleep. It's something you should know about me.

2. I could not fully enjoy my walk-about-college-campus with my friends because it felt less like a carefree frolick through the fields of memory and more like the last leg of Sam and Frodo's journey into Mount Doom. It was hot and exhausting and my belongings seemed to get heavier and heavier the further we walked. And nobody was like, "I can't carry [your camera]...but I can carry you!"

3. Cuddling with Matt on the leather couch in my living room is more hot-and-sticky than cozy. And not hot-and-sticky in a good way, don't you get any ideas.

4. All hot food is completely unpalatable in this weather. For dinner my mom had made fried tilapia and though I like fish, I could think of nothing more disgusting than fried food. I was like, how about watermelon? How about blueberries with cinnamon ice cream? No? Oh right, because it's THE FIRST FUCKING WEEKEND OF MAY.

PROS

Likewise, the pros can be boiled down to one Amazing Super Pro:

Matt and I finally found people to play D&D with!!

On Sunday night Matt and I hung out with our friends who happen to be engaged, let's call them Scotty and Jewel. And it was a huge success because not only did we play LOTR Trivial Pursuit (in which we came up with kick-ass theme song for the Nazgûl which basically amounts to "IT'S CHAAASING YOUUU" and "RUN AWAAAAY") and get to cuddle with their adorable kittens, but we also discovered that we all want to try Dungeons and Dragons -- like, old-school, tabletop, Monster Manual, Funyuns-and-Mountain-Dew D&D. I'm ridiculously excited, despite the fact that I'm not really sure how this is gonna work.

We have the tools: Jewel's dad has an original game set from the 70's, complete with a 12-sided die and a Dungeonmaster's Guide.

We have a DM: Scotty, chosen by the very official process of me suddenly blurting out, "I VOTE SCOTTY FOR DUNGEONMASTER."

We have the experience: most of us have done some form of roleplaying or strategy gaming.

And I have a cloak! I do have a cloak. So that should come in handy.

But none of us has actually played D&D before. We're all firmly footed in other aspects of geekery -- Scotty plays war games with tiny metal figurines, Jewel is completely obsessed with writing Stargate fanfiction, Matt would probably rather play video games than anything else in the world, and I'm... well, I'm kind of a well-rounded, anything-goes geek -- but never have we delved so deep into True Geek Culture. It's sort of intimidating. But also really exciting.

So! I'll let you know how that goes.

And as for the final verdict on the weekend: Awesome. Hot, but awesome. How was yours?

Pros and Cons: Saturday, May 1

2010-05-02T01:48:00.006-04:00

Pros

I went to a party and I met a girl from Canada. I accidentally told Matt she was from Ottawa even though she told me she was from Toronto.
Actually, what she had said was that she was "from Tronno." Which was a huge pro.
At the same party, I saw some of my cousins and we had a lot of laughs.
And a lot of cake.
I drank wine, which is almost always fun (barring the Arbor Mist Debacle of March 2009)
My sister and I had an epic Boyz II Men sing-along in the car on the way home.
I learned the corniest and best joke ever, but you have to know a little French to get it: The One-Two-Three Cat and the Une-Deux-Trois Cat had a race in the swimming pool. The One-Two-Three Cat won. Do you know why?
Because the Une-Deux-Trois Cat sank. (Say it out loud, French speakers. Say it out loud. Then groan. Then feel free to backhand slap me through your computer screens.)

Cons

Said Canadian girl told me she hates the Flyers.
Boo on not being able to bond over a sport because of team rivalries.
I got eaten alive by mosquitoes because we were sitting outside the whole time.
I hardly got any good reading time in, which sucks because I'm like 40 pages away from finishing V For Vendetta.
I feel like I just need to finish it so I can start reading it again
Because holy shit I have almost no idea what is going on in that book.
I kinda lost my voice a little bit from all of the epic sing-alonging.
Nobody laughed at my corny joke. Sad face.

Well, so far this weekend the pros and cons are neck-and-neck. Tomorrow I'm hanging out at my old college campus with one set of friends during the day, and then, in the evening, I'm going over to my engaged friends' house with Matt to eat pizza and play the incredibly geeky game Setters of Catan. So we'll see what the tally looks like on Sunday. Keep on having a good weekend everyone, and DFTBA.

a beacon of Happy in this week of Suck

2010-04-30T10:18:00.000-04:00

This week has been kind of a mixed bag. On the one hand, I had a pretty kickass birthday, and this week I got to enjoy all of my new presents (read: toys) and I got a package in the mail, and who doesn't love getting real mail?

On the other hand....my friend and co-worker Brian was in a hit-and-run early Saturday morning, and though they tried to resuscitate him, he died at the hospital a couple of hours later. He was only 26--that's three years older than me--and he was completely, completely beloved. He was our golden boy. And now he's gone.

So in that respect, this week has been one of the hardest I can remember. Coming in to work after I found out was almost too much to bear. On Wednesday I went to his viewing, which was gut-wrenching. And yesterday morning was the funeral, which I opted not to attend.

The worst part is that I feel I can't get any space from his death. Every time I come into work, there's more news about how we're opening late on Thursday so everyone can go to his memorial service, or how we're starting a fund in his name, or how we're going to have a luncheon in his memory, or how we're raffling off a basket of Phillies-related stuff because he loved the Phillies more than anything else in the world. I'm torn between being happy that we're doing so much to celebrate him and being overwhelmed because I just want everyone to stop. Talking. About. It. For. One. Second. Sometimes I'm sitting at my desk and it occurs to me that I will never see him again, and it's like I can't breathe. And suddenly, everything I look at is him. And all of the memories come flooding back. I don't know how the people who've known him for years can possibly stand to walk into the building. And I don't even want to think about the grief his parents and brothers and sisters are going through.

I don't have to go to work today, so I'm looking forward to just resting and re-charging, and I'll see how it feels tomorrow when I go in again. Writing this blog post has already been immensely helpful, as I've been able to write down all of the things I've been keeping inside all week, to release them, in a way.

Oh, speaking of blogging.

Just wanted to point out something new: I'm trying out Disqus for my comments. I love to respond to your comments and I think it'll be easier to do that with Disqus. I hope it works out because, well, I don't know how to uninstall it. Also...

It's been one short week since I started this blog and I just wanted to say how grateful I am for all of the comments and encouragement, from new blog friends and old ones. You all really have been a beacon of Happy in this week of Suck.

it's a magic number

2010-04-29T11:26:00.002-04:00

Memes are one of my all-time favorite things. When I was 12 and the Intarwebs was new, I was that person who filled out every goddamn chain-mail "get to know me!" meme and proceeded to spam all of my little 7th-grade friends. I can't believe AOL didn't ban my account. Anyway, I have a couple saved to my desktop but I wanted to start with this one. I nabbed it from the awesome ethony. (Even though I wasn't tagged. Is that proper blog-iquette? Well, it is now.) We're gonna call it... The Power of THREE. (Charmed reference, anyone?)

Three Names I Go By
Melissa
Melly
Asian Sally (...but that's another post.)

Three Jobs I’ve Had
Stock girl at a bargain-basement type housewares store (UberSuck.)
Math and writing tutor for rich kids (AKA a glorified babysitter)
Assistant Youth Services Librarian (that's my current job)

Three Places I’ve ~~Lived~~ Traveled To [I've lived in NJ my whole life, soo...]
Madrid, Spain
Galway, Ireland
The Philippines (I was 12 and we visited family, so I can't remember exactly where we went.)

Three Places I’d Like To Go
The Grand Canyon
Middle Earth. I mean, New Zealand.
Toyko

Three Favourite Drinks
Starbucks Iced Mocha (seriously, they're like crack)
Plain Old Water
Malibu Bay Breeze (nothing like three or four of these to knock you on your ass and have you deciding it's a good idea to take the glass home in your bag and the waitress tells you you can't do that so you cry and then you go into the bathroom and you're not sure but you think you started singing along to the music while you were peeing.)
(....What?)

Three TV Shows I Watch
Mythbusters (see previous post)
Futurama
Platinum Weddings. I CAN'T HELP IT.

Three Favourite Old TV Shows
Boy Meets World (I watched this earlier today, and I'm telling you it stands the test of time. It was brilliant.)
The Twilight Zone
Nickelodeon's Roundhouse. Please tell me someone else watched this show. I need to believe that it was real!

Three Favourite Foods
Macaroni salad (I know, who am I, the Barefoot Contessa? But seriously, I can't live without it.)
Arroz Caldo, which is, as I know it, this awesome delicious rice porridge that my awesome Filipino mom makes on New Year's Day and when I'm sick.
Carrot Cake (I know, who am I, the Barefoot Contessa? Whoa. Déjà vu.)

Three Make-Up Products I Can’t Live Without
Urban Decay's Primer Potion
Bare Minerals Mineral Veil
Benefit BadGal LASH Mascara

Three Things I’m Looking Forward To
This weekend, cause I'm visiting my college campus with my friends Cait and Katie
Tonight after work, cause Matt and I are going out to watch the Flyers/Montreal game and probably drink ourselves blind.
February 2011, cause that's when I'm going on a cruise of the Western Caribbean with my best friend Lindsay and we are gonna go sightseeing and eat until we burst and probably drink ourselves blind.

Three People I'm Tagging
Matt. You need something to blog about.
Amber. You're hilarious and I want to see what you do with this.
Kara. I like you.
And Angela, because I get one more for good luck. And because I like you.

shake it up and down

2010-04-28T11:42:00.010-04:00

One thing you should know about me is that I spend nearly all of my free time with my boyfriend Matt, and I'm not particularly ashamed to admit that. I mean, I'd love to divide my time evenly between my friends and my boyfriend, but I don't get to see my BFFs on a regular basis, because one of them lives in Queens, one of them lives in Hartford, CT, and one of them is a first-grade teacher and therefore has no life. It's sad because we all used to live 8 minutes from each other and some of my best memories were made possible by this proximity. But that's another post.

Anyway, Matt and I are usually pretty boring. We're always having a blast, but from an outside perspective you probably wouldn't think so. We wouldn't make for very good reality TV, is what I'm saying.

Sometimes he comes over and we do couples stuff like go out for dinner or ride bikes or sit in a Starbucks and discuss whether we prefer the Marvel or DC universe.

Sometimes we stay in and watch Mythbusters or a movie or try to get through as many episodes of Neon Genesis Evangelion as we can before I fall asleep (I actually like NGE... but that's another post).

Sometimes we end up spending 3 1/2 hours doing quizzes on Sporcle, my absolute favorite procrastination tool. Once we did one where you have to name all the Generation One Pokemon characters, and we got all of them except two. #thatkindofgeek

Sometimes I realize I needed to upload and edit some pictures and I do that for 40 minutes while Matt watches hockey (alternately, sometimes we watch hockey together).

But yesterday my sister Melanie joined us. Mel is basically like a perfect clone of me. We have the same face and body type, the same voice, even disturbingly similar personalities. Our only difference is that my boobs are bigger and more luscious and appealing than hers.

But my point is that when my sister, Matt, and I get together, everything is way more hilarious. For instance, Matt and I had played Super Mario Wii before, and we'd had a good time marveling over the game and taking it extremely seriously. Here's a sample of quotes from those nights, to give you an idea of the mood:

Wow, this level is really fun.

I love how faithful they were to the original game.

What are Goombas supposed to be?

I wonder why we haven't found any Warp Zones yet.

etc., so on.

But last night Mel played too. Now I'll share the quotes that were generated from that event.

The "Anyone Listening Who Didn't Know What We Were Doing Would Be Confused" ones:

It'd be nice if it were the end of the world, but it's not.

::Gasp! It is! It IS the end of the world!

The "Penguin" series, which there were many of, since we were in the ice level:

It's impossible without being a penguin, don't you agree?

It's never a penguin when you need it to be.

I don't think he needs to be a penguin here.

And my personal faves, the "That's What She Said" ones:

Awww, you forgot to be big.

Oh! Shake your thing up and down. Shake it up and down. There you go.

Yay! Now you can beat it even more!

So I guess the moral of this story is, hooray for sisters. And hooray for video games. And hooray for quotes taken out of context. All of those things make life a little more awesome.

In case you were wondering...

2010-04-26T19:22:00.018-04:00

Part One

Until about 3 years ago, I was the nicest Nice Asian Girl ever.

I wanted to be a high school English teacher.
I was an academic overachiever, completely obsessed with my studies. I spent 90% of my time doing work.
I never drank and I was generally scandalized by the whole concept of drug use.
I was a practicing Catholic and an all-around socially conservative person.
I was totally afraid of anything having to do with romantic intimacy, to the point where I had proclaimed that I would wait until after marriage to have sex (a decision which I attributed to my devotion to Catholic dogma -- but actually came out of fear and panic).

But then the first pillar fell: I started student teaching and it was a catastrophe. I couldn't do it. I couldn't bring myself to teach Othello to seniors. I had thought it was my dream career, but instead of being ecstatic, I didn't even want to wake up in the morning. When I finally accepted that I didn't want to be a teacher, at first it was wildly liberating, but in time I began to feel incredibly lost. If not teach, what the fuck would I do with my ENORMOUSLY useful degree in English? Why was I even in college if I didn't have a direction? Wasn't that an enormous waste of money and effort?

I started to majorly slack at school. And when I received my first "F" in a college-level class, my self-perception faltered. Who was this person who made up bullshit excuses to professors and didn't turn in major assignments? If something that seemed to define me as much as my Good Studenthood did could be compromised so easily, what other parts of my identity were impermanent and paper-thin, too?

I didn't know at the time, but I was about to find out that the answer to that question was "almost everything."

To be continued...